In the course of their military careers, soldiers develop emotional coping strategies that serve them well while performing their duties.
These same strategies can become barriers to intimacy at home if they are not properly managed. Here's how to handle this situation.
Acknowledge that your emotional coping strategies were useful in service but may be outdated now. Military personnel may have developed a sense of detachment from others during training, which can make it difficult to form deep connections with loved ones at home. They may also find it challenging to express themselves openly about feelings due to being conditioned to suppress emotions during combat situations. It is essential to identify the ways in which these habits affect one's personal life.
Communicate honestly with family members about how one's coping mechanisms impact them. Being upfront about how one's actions affect those closest to them allows for understanding and support as needed. One may even consider seeking therapy or counseling together to work through issues that arise when trying to connect emotionally with others.
Focus on developing new communication skills that promote intimacy. This could include learning to listen more actively, practicing non-verbal cues such as body language and eye contact, and being mindful of tone and word choice when speaking with loved ones.
Engaging in shared activities like hobbies or exercise can help create closeness between partners by providing common experiences outside of daily routines.
Remember that relationships take time and effort to build and maintain. It takes patience, vulnerability, and trust to grow closer over time, so don't give up too quickly if progress seems slow at first. Take breaks if necessary but don't withdraw entirely from relationships just because it gets hard sometimes. Give yourself credit for making an effort towards better connection despite any obstacles in the way.
Managing emotional coping strategies acquired in service requires a proactive approach to identifying and addressing their effects on intimate relationships. By acknowledging their role in shaping behavior patterns, communicating openly with loved ones about concerns, working on new communication skills, and persevering through challenges, former military personnel can improve their ability to form meaningful connections after leaving active duty.
How do individuals manage emotional coping strategies acquired in service when those strategies become obstacles to intimacy at home?
People can manage their acquired emotional coping strategies by understanding that they may not be appropriate for every situation. They should also recognize the negative impact these strategies have on their relationships with others. It is important to seek professional help if needed and develop healthier ways of dealing with stress and trauma. Additionally, communication and openness are key factors in maintaining intimacy in relationships.