The term "sexual orientation" refers to an individual's physical, romantic, and/or emotional attraction toward people of a specific gender identity, regardless of biological sex. This definition is intentionally broad to include a variety of forms of sexual expression that may be fluid over time.
Some individuals experience varying degrees of attraction to both men and women throughout their life, while others identify exclusively as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, or otherwise. It can also refer to one's ability to express oneself in a sexual manner, such as through pornography consumption, masturbation, partnered intimacy, and other actions. The denial of this aspect of human behavior has severe consequences for those who internalize it.
Many LGBTQ+ individuals have been conditioned from childhood to believe that being gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender is wrong. As a result, they may repress these feelings deep within themselves without admitting them to themselves or anyone else. This creates cognitive dissonance, wherein there is a conflict between what someone believes and what they know to be true about themselves. They may experience confusion, anxiety, depression, suicidality, substance abuse, and more due to suppressing their desires. These mental health issues are compounded by societal pressures to conform to a cis-heteronormative standard of normality.
Emotional effects of denial range from shame and guilt to fear and embarrassment. Many individuals struggle with self-esteem because they feel flawed or defective, leading to isolation and loneliness. This often leads to increased risk-taking behaviors, including unsafe sex practices and promiscuity. Relationships may become fraught with tension and conflict, as partners sense a disconnect in the individual's desire for closeness and physical connection. Interventions can help address these issues.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one effective intervention, which focuses on changing negative thought patterns into positive ones. It involves exploring unhelpful beliefs and replacing them with evidence-based truths.
An individual might learn that being homosexual does not make them less worthy than others or lead to social rejection. Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) is another type of intervention, focusing on developing acceptance of the individual's sexual orientation rather than trying to change it. ACT teaches strategies like mindfulness meditation, cognitive defusion, values clarification, and exposure exercises.
Acceptance and integration can also be facilitated through peer support groups, such as those offered by PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). These provide a safe space for individuals to discuss their experiences without judgment or criticism. They offer validation and understanding, helping people process their emotions and find strength in community. Other forms of group therapy, such as family systems or couples counseling, are also available.
Denial of sexual orientation can have serious consequences for mental health and relationships.
There are many interventions available to assist in psychological integration and self-acceptance. With patience and practice, anyone can learn to embrace who they are and build meaningful connections based on honesty and authenticity.
What cognitive and emotional consequences arise from internalized denial of sexual orientation, and how can interventions facilitate psychological integration?
People who experience internalized homophobia may feel anxiety about their sexuality and identity due to cultural pressures or social stigma. This can lead to feelings of shame, guilt, and low self-esteem. They may also feel isolated, lonely, and have difficulty forming relationships with others. Interventions that foster self-acceptance and positive self-image can help individuals integrate their sexuality into their overall sense of self.