Soldiers experience various forms of physical and mental stress during war, which can have severe consequences on their relationships. The post-war period is characterized by the absence of combat and the presence of an increased need for emotional support. This period presents unique challenges to soldiers' relationships because they must now establish new connections based on mutual understanding, empathy, and affection. Soldiers who are close to one another often develop a special bond known as "battle buddies" due to the intensity of shared experiences.
This bond can be disrupted by trauma exposure. When soldiers return home, they may struggle to reconstruct relational trust, intimacy, and attachment security following trauma.
Soldiers face significant changes when returning from military service. Their identities change from being part of a unit to becoming civilians again. They must adapt to life outside the military and find ways to cope with civilian responsibilities. These transitions can lead to feelings of isolation, confusion, anxiety, depression, and guilt. In addition, many soldiers suffer from symptoms related to PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) or TBI (traumatic brain injury), including flashbacks, nightmares, insomnia, hypervigilance, irritability, anger outbursts, avoidant behaviors, and difficulty concentrating. These issues affect their relationships with friends and family members.
Soldiers may become detached from loved ones, withdraw socially, or act aggressively. To restore relational trust in these situations, soldiers need communication skills training that emphasizes active listening, empathy, non-verbal cues, and positive reinforcement.
Intimacy is also impacted after combat deployment due to soldiers' emotional numbing or increased sexual drive. Intimacy requires vulnerability and openness, which becomes challenging for those who have experienced trauma. Sexuality is often associated with closeness and safety; therefore, it can help soldiers feel connected to others and experience pleasure while coping with post-traumatic stress.
Intimate relationships are not without risks, such as infidelity, rejection, disappointment, or betrayal. Reconstructing intimacy after war requires open conversations about needs, desires, boundaries, and expectations. Couples therapy can be beneficial in this situation because a therapist can facilitate honest dialogue and offer strategies for addressing relationship problems.
Attachment security refers to the feeling of being safe and secure in close relationships. Soldiers may struggle with attachment following military service because they have learned to depend on their unit for survival and protection. This dependence leads them to seek comfort and support outside their families or partnerships.
They must learn to rely on themselves again and build healthy connections based on mutual care and understanding. It is crucial for couples to develop new routines, hobbies, and activities together to rebuild intimacy and attachment security. Family members should show support by providing emotional support, respect, validation, affection, and praise.
To reestablish relational trust, intimacy, and attachment security, soldiers need time and patience. They require an environment that fosters communication and empathy, allowing them to share feelings and experiences safely. Relationship education programs can provide resources for soldiers and their partners to overcome challenges related to trauma exposure.
Social events like community outings, sports games, concerts, or dinners can help create new memories and strengthen bonds within existing ones. By prioritizing self-care, seeking professional help when needed, and engaging in healthy relationships, soldiers can begin to heal from traumatic experiences while creating lasting connections at home.
How do soldiers reconstruct relational trust, intimacy, and attachment security following trauma?
The process of reconstructing relational trust, intimacy, and attachment security among veterans can be challenging as they have experienced various types of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms and are prone to developing distrustful attitudes toward people due to their military service.