In today's society, people often seek validation from others to feel wanted and loved. It is believed that when someone desires you, it increases your confidence, boosts self-esteem, and makes you feel accepted and appreciated.
This perception can lead to unsatisfying experiences in the long run. Initiatives such as sending flirty messages or taking the first step towards getting intimate are usually seen as signs of being desired but do not necessarily result in long-term happiness.
The brain releases chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during initiative, which are responsible for pleasure and satisfaction. But these hormones wear off quickly, leading to feelings of emptiness and dissatisfaction soon after.
Relying solely on initiative to feel desired can create unrealistic expectations, resulting in disappointment and frustration. If you don't receive any reciprocation, you may question why they didn't respond positively and wonder what you did wrong. This negatively affects your mental health and relationships.
To avoid this, focus on building emotional connections instead of physical attraction. Emotional connection involves trust, communication, vulnerability, and mutual respect. These qualities lead to a deeper level of intimacy and fulfillment. When both partners are committed to creating a strong bond, they feel secure, valued, and appreciated, regardless of whether there is sexual tension or not. A relationship based on shared interests, goals, values, and emotions lasts longer than one based on physical desire alone.
Initiating intimacy requires courage, but it should be done from a place of love and vulnerability rather than fear or desperation. Taking the time to connect with your partner emotionally, listening actively, and expressing yourself authentically will help build a solid foundation for a healthy relationship. Be patient and accepting; it takes effort and dedication to maintain a long-term romance, but it is worth it when you find someone who loves and appreciates you for who you are.
Feeling wanted through initiative can give temporary satisfaction but does not guarantee long-term happiness. Instead, prioritize emotional connection and meaningful conversations that lead to lasting intimacy. Invest in relationships that value you as an individual and provide security and support beyond physical attraction. Remember that true satisfaction comes from within, and focusing on self-love and personal growth can improve your relationships.
How does the perception of “being desired” through initiative affect long-term satisfaction?
Research has shown that individuals who are pursued by others tend to be more satisfied with their relationships compared to those who do not actively pursue others (Brown & Ryan, 2019). This suggests that initiating contact with romantic partners may lead to increased feelings of being desired and ultimately increase relationship satisfaction over time.