Dependency is an intense emotional connection between people that can lead to cycles of avoidance and clinging. These cycles are characterized by periods of closeness followed by withdrawal, leading to feelings of abandonment and fear of rejection. In order to understand how dependency creates these cycles, it's important to examine the psychological factors involved.
The first factor is attachment theory. According to this theory, humans have an innate need for secure attachments to others from infancy onward. When a baby is born, they rely on their parents for survival and security. If their needs aren't met, they may develop anxiety about being abandoned and rejecting those who care for them. This can manifest later in life as a pattern of depending on others for affection and support while also feeling anxious when those people leave or become unavailable.
Another factor is low self-esteem. People who struggle with low self-esteem often seek out relationships to validate themselves and gain a sense of worth. They may feel like they cannot function without someone else's approval or attention, leading to a cycle of dependency and codependency. This can be especially true if the person has been abused or traumatized in some way.
A third factor is addiction. Addictive behaviors such as alcoholism or substance abuse can create a physical dependency on drugs or alcohol, but emotional dependencies can also form in relationships.
A person may use their partner as a crutch or source of comfort instead of developing healthy coping skills.
This can lead to a reliance on the other person that becomes difficult to break away from.
To break the cycle of avoidance and clinging, individuals must learn to recognize and address underlying issues that contribute to their dependence. They may benefit from therapy or support groups that help them build healthier communication skills, set boundaries, and establish independence.
It's important to remember that no one should depend on another person for their entire happiness or wellbeing - we are all capable of finding fulfillment within ourselves.
How does dependency create cycles of avoidance and clinging?
Dependency creates cycles of avoidance and clinging when one's needs for emotional support are not met through healthy means. When someone feels that they cannot rely on themselves for their happiness, they may become overly dependent on others. This can lead to feelings of anxiety and low self-esteem, which can cause them to become more needy and demanding.