The concept of suppression is often associated with psychology's examination of human behavior, which refers to an individual's ability to restrain their natural inclinations, instincts, and impulses. This can occur for several reasons, including the desire to adhere to societal standards, cultural expectations, religious beliefs, family values, parental guidance, or peer pressure. In terms of sexual behavior and desire, these constraints are known as "sexual norms," and they may differ from person to person based on factors like age, gender, race, religion, socioeconomic status, geographic location, and more.
Conforming to these social norms entails behaving according to what society expects regarding one's sexuality, desires, and relationships.
Some individuals may feel pressured into engaging in heterosexual activity when they identify as LGBTQIA+, whereas others may face judgment if they pursue non-monogamous romantic relationships. The repercussions of such suppression can be severe, leading to emotional distress, stress, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and relationship problems.
Suppression creates a sense of cognitive dissonance, whereby individuals experience inner conflict between their actual thoughts and feelings and their external actions. This can lead to increased negative thoughts and emotions about oneself, creating a cycle of guilt and shame that further hinders an individual's ability to express their true desires and needs. As a result, many people become anxious in intimate situations, struggle with trust issues, avoid closeness altogether, or even develop physical symptoms like insomnia, nausea, or sweating.
Suppressed individuals may begin to believe that their innate sexual preferences or fantasies are abnormal or unacceptable, perpetuating the cycle of negative thoughts and feelings. They may also internalize societal messages that equate certain types of behavior with morality, leading them to doubt their own values and judgments. Consequently, they may become alienated from themselves and those around them, struggling to find fulfillment in life due to their repressed desires.
The consequences of suppression can also extend beyond psychological effects, impacting personal and professional relationships.
An individual who hides their same-sex attraction from friends and family may feel isolated and lonely, while someone who struggles with polyamory may face social stigma and disapproval from partners or colleagues.
These conflicts can cause significant emotional distress, impeding one's ability to form meaningful connections and live authentically.
It is essential for individuals to recognize when their conformity to sexual norms contradicts their personal beliefs and desires. While there may be external pressures to act against our instincts, we must prioritize self-care and authenticity over adherence to cultural expectations. By doing so, we can break free from harmful patterns and cultivate healthier, more fulfilling intimate relationships.
How does conformity to social sexual norms conflict with personal desires, and what psychological consequences arise from suppression over time?
The pressure of adhering to traditional gender roles and expectations can be detrimental to one's individual identity and sense of self-worth. Research has shown that individuals who do not fit into prescribed sex stereotypes may experience increased feelings of shame, guilt, and anxiety as well as lower levels of self-esteem and life satisfaction (Baumeister & Leary, 1997).