The experience of war can be traumatic for many reasons, but one aspect that is often neglected is the toll it takes on personal relationships. When soldiers are deployed, they must prioritize their own survival above all else, which can create feelings of guilt and disconnection from loved ones back home. These experiences can have long-lasting effects on both individuals and families. In this article, we will explore how soldiers manage relational guilt associated with prioritizing survival over emotional connection.
Prioritization of Survival
When soldiers are deployed, they face constant danger and stress that require them to make quick decisions to stay alive. They may need to put aside emotional connections with friends and family members in order to focus on the task at hand. This can lead to feelings of guilt and shame, as well as difficulty reconnecting with loved ones upon return.
Soldiers who have been wounded or experienced combat trauma may struggle to form strong bonds with others due to fear and mistrust.
Consequences of Prioritization
The consequences of prioritizing survival over emotional connection can be far-reaching. Soldiers may feel isolated and alone, leading to increased rates of depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Families may also suffer from separation anxiety and worry about the safety of their loved ones. Children may develop attachment issues or feel resentment towards their parent's absence.
Managing Relational Guilt
To manage relational guilt, soldiers may use various coping mechanisms such as writing letters or emails, calling home regularly, and seeking counseling services. Some may even turn to substance abuse or other addictive behaviors to numb the pain of feeling disconnected.
These strategies may not always be effective in alleviating long-term effects of trauma.
Finding Support Systems
Soldiers who experience relational guilt should seek support systems outside of their immediate families. Veterans groups, therapists, and mental health professionals can provide a safe space for processing feelings and developing new relationships. It is important for civilians to show understanding and empathy towards veterans, recognizing the unique challenges they face.
Strategies for Connection
Strategies for building connections after deployment include establishing routines, setting boundaries, and being open and honest about emotions. Family members can also work on improving communication skills and practicing active listening.
Rebuilding trust and intimacy takes time and patience, but with effort and compassion, it is possible to overcome the damage caused by prioritizing survival over emotional connection.
How do soldiers manage relational guilt associated with prioritizing survival over emotional connection?
Soldiers who are experiencing relational guilt due to putting their survival before an emotional connection may find it helpful to recognize that this is a natural response to high stress situations. They can also remind themselves that they did not choose to be put in this situation, and that focusing on their own survival does not mean that they don't care about others or have failed as a partner/friend/family member.