Rebuilding sexual confidence can be a challenging process, especially if your fantasies have been criticized. It's important to remember that everyone has different fantasies and desires, and it's normal to explore them. However, if you've experienced criticism for yours, it can make you feel ashamed and unsure about expressing yourself. Here are some steps you can take to start rebuilding your sexual confidence and feeling more comfortable exploring your fantasies again:
1. Recognize that your fantasies are valid and acceptable. It's common to have unique and unusual fantasies, and there is no right or wrong way to feel turned on. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Remember that you're entitled to your own pleasure and should never feel embarrassed or ashamed for what turns you on.
2. Explore other ways to express your sexuality. If your partner doesn't share your fantasies, try finding ways to get turned on without sharing specific details. You might enjoy roleplaying scenarios or trying new positions in bed. You could also explore solo masturbation or watch erotic videos together. This will help you feel more confident in your sexuality and less dependent on external validation.
3. Talk openly with your partner about your needs and desires. Communicating honestly with your partner can help build trust and intimacy. Be clear about what you want and why, but avoid being accusatory or judgmental. Instead, focus on understanding their perspective and finding compromises that work for both of you.
4. Seek out a supportive community. Join online groups, read books, or attend workshops focused on sex positivity and self-exploration. Meeting people who share similar interests can be empowering and validate your experiences. They may even have advice for working through any shame you feel.
5. Try new things that make you feel good. Experimenting with different activities, like massages or kinky play, can help build confidence in your body and sexuality. You might even find new preferences that surprise you! Just remember to stay safe, communicate clearly, and respect boundaries at all times.
Rebuilding sexual confidence after having your fantasies criticized can be difficult, but it is possible. By recognizing your desires as valid, exploring alternative methods of satisfaction, communicating effectively with partners, seeking support, and trying new things, you can regain your sense of sexual freedom and power. Remember: everyone has unique fantasies, and they should never be judged or shamed.