When you feel shameful about your body, emotions, behaviors, beliefs, or experiences related to your gender identity, orientation, or sexual practices, it can be difficult to live up to social norms. You might feel judged for who you are, which can lead to depression, anxiety, isolation, substance abuse, self-harm, violence against yourself or others, and suicide.
Being rejected for who you are can make you feel ashamed again, reinforcing the idea that there's something wrong with you. But when society accepts people like you, it becomes easier to accept yourself. It can help reduce feelings of guilt, anger, despair, fear, and loneliness. When you don't need to hide your true nature from others, you have more energy to focus on your work, family, hobbies, friendships, and personal growth. You become part of the community, rather than an outcast.
Acceptance makes you more resilient to stress and adversity. When other people accept you as you are, they are less likely to reject you in times of crisis. They'll listen if you need support or advice, and they may even offer resources and referrals. You can ask for what you want without worrying about rejection. Your relationships will grow stronger as you spend time together learning and exploring.
Some aspects of being accepted remain challenging.
If a group is accepting but not diverse, it could exclude people like you. Or if the majority culture has negative attitudes toward you, prejudice might hurt your job prospects or quality of life. Acceptance alone isn't enough. It must be accompanied by tolerance and respect.
When you find people who understand you, it eases social pressure and lets you express yourself freely. But even with understanding friends, families, coworkers, and communities, some parts of yourself may still cause shame or embarrassment. Being different doesn't change just because society accepts you. You're always at risk of feeling guilty, ashamed, or unworthy.
Being accepted in a tolerant society is important for reducing shame, guilt, and isolation. It allows you to learn from others, feel validated, and get help when needed.
It does not replace therapy, counseling, or self-acceptance. Nor does it solve all problems related to identity, orientation, gender, sexuality, or sex.
How does being accepted in a tolerant society interact with previously internalized shame or guilt?
Being accepted in a tolerant society can have a positive impact on reducing previously internalized shame or guilt. When an individual feels accepted by others, they may feel more confident in themselves and their beliefs, which can lead to reduced feelings of self-doubt and increased self-esteem. This acceptance can also provide opportunities for growth and development, allowing individuals to explore new ideas and experiences that were previously off-limits due to social stigma or discrimination.