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MAINTAINING PSYCHOSEXUAL COMPATIBILITY IN MILITARY MARRIAGES: HOW LONG SEPARATIONS AFFECT INTIMACY DURING DEPLOYMENT

3 min read Sexual Health

Military life is full of challenges that can impact a couple's psychological well-being. One such challenge is the effect of traumatic experiences and operational unpredictability on their relationship. This article explores how military couples can maintain their psychosexual compatibility despite these obstacles.

Psychosexual compatibility in military marriages

Psychosexual compatibility refers to the degree of harmony between partners regarding their physical and emotional needs during sexual activities. It includes factors like communication, trust, intimacy, and mutual attraction. Military couples have unique challenges that may threaten their psychosexual compatibility, including long separations due to deployment, frequent relocations, and exposure to dangerous situations.

Deployment stress

Deployment can be mentally and emotionally taxing for both partners. The partner left behind may feel anxious about the safety of their spouse, while the deployed partner may experience high levels of stress and anxiety. These feelings can disrupt the normal flow of day-to-day life, making it difficult to find time or energy for intimate moments. To overcome this challenge, couples must communicate openly and honestly about their concerns and expectations. They should also engage in meaningful activities together, such as watching movies or reading books, to stay connected.

Operational uncertainty

Uncertainty about when or where they will deploy next can also affect a couple's psychosexual compatibility. Constant changes in schedules and responsibilities can cause tension and resentment, leading to a decrease in physical and emotional intimacy. Couples can manage this by planning ahead and creating routines that work around the operational demands of military life.

Setting aside specific times for romantic dates or sex can help keep things predictable and consistent despite unpredictability.

Trauma impact on sexuality

Traumatic experiences can also impact a couple's psychosexual compatibility. Military personnel often witness traumatic events, which can cause them to withdraw from their partners emotionally and physically. This can lead to a loss of interest in sex and other aspects of intimacy. It is crucial for couples to understand each other's needs and provide support during these challenging times. Couples can practice mindfulness techniques like meditation or deep breathing exercises to calm themselves before engaging in sexual activity.

Maintaining psychosexual compatibility

Maintaining psychosexual compatibility requires effort and communication from both partners. One partner cannot solve all the problems alone; it takes teamwork. Some strategies include:

1. Communication: Talk openly and honestly about your needs and expectations, including your hopes and fears regarding intimacy. Share your desires and concerns without judgment or criticism.

2. Active listening: Listen attentively to your partner's ideas and perspectives to build trust and understanding.

3. Date nights: Plan regular date nights to maintain intimacy and connection despite busy schedules.

4. Sexual exploration: Try new activities, positions, or fantasies to spice up your relationship and explore each other's boundaries.

5. Counseling: Seek professional help if necessary to address underlying issues that may affect sexuality, such as depression or anxiety disorders.

6. Self-care: Take care of yourself mentally and physically by practicing healthy habits, such as exercise or relaxation techniques.

How do military couples maintain psychosexual compatibility when trauma and operational unpredictability disrupt relational continuity?

A number of studies have shown that long deployments can significantly affect sexual intimacy between military couples (e. g. , Tracy et al. , 2015). This is because both parties experience physical and emotional separation due to the nature of military work, which can lead to feelings of distress, loneliness, and confusion about one's relationship status.

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