Relationship Negotiations Post Trauma
Relationships are complicated enough under normal circumstances, but when trauma has entered the picture, things can become even more difficult. It's important to remember that everyone experiences trauma differently, so it will affect each relationship uniquely.
There are some general principles that can help guide you through negotiating after experiencing a traumatic event.
One thing to keep in mind is communication. Be open and honest about your feelings with your partner, but also be aware of their needs and boundaries. If they need space, give them space. If they need reassurance, offer it freely. If they want to talk, listen actively and without judgment. Communication is key in all aspects of life, but especially when dealing with trauma.
Another principle is self-care. Make sure you are taking care of yourself emotionally, physically, and mentally before trying to take care of anyone else. This means getting enough rest, eating well, and engaging in activities that bring you joy. It also means setting healthy boundaries for yourself and sticking to them. Self-care is not selfish - it's necessary for both partners in the relationship to feel safe and secure.
Don't forget that relationships are built on trust. Trust takes time and effort to build, but it can be broken quickly if either party feels betrayed or untrustworthy. After trauma, it's easy to lose faith in others, which can lead to resentment and hurt. Work together as a team to rebuild trust by being transparent and accountable. Don't hold grudges or blame each other for past mistakes; instead, focus on moving forward together.
Negotiating post-trauma can be difficult, but there are some principles that can make it easier. Remember to communicate clearly and respectfully, practice self-care, and work together to build trust. With these things in mind, you and your partner can navigate this difficult time together and come out stronger than ever.
What processes govern relational negotiation post-trauma?
The processes governing relational negotiation after traumatic experiences can be understood through the lens of attachment theory. Attachment is an innate psychological process that involves the development of relationships with significant others throughout life. During times of stress, such as those experienced following a traumatic event, individuals may seek out familiar faces for support and security. This phenomenon is known as "attachment reorganization" and is a natural part of the healing process.