Survivors' emotional vulnerability
A study published in the Journal of Family Psychology examined how individuals who had experienced infidelity in their relationship coped with it and moved forward to build trust again. The researchers found that participants felt more anxious about the possibility of being cheated on again after experiencing infidelity. This anxiety was linked to lower levels of commitment and greater feelings of distrust towards their partner. As a result, they were less likely to initiate intimate acts such as cuddling or kissing out of fear of rejection or betrayal. Survivors may also experience flashbacks or intrusive thoughts related to the betrayal, which can interfere with their ability to connect deeply with new partners. They may feel ashamed or guilty for these negative thoughts, making them hesitant to share them with others and seek support.
Coping mechanisms
To manage these fears, survivors may engage in strategies such as avoidance or control.
They might try to ignore their anxieties or actively try to suppress them.
This approach often backfires because it does not address the underlying issues that lead to the fear. Another strategy is to seek external validation by constantly checking up on their partner or monitoring their behavior. This can create tension and distance between the couple. Alternatively, some survivors may try to control their partner's behavior by setting strict rules or restrictions on their interactions. While this may provide temporary relief, it ultimately undermines the trust needed for healthy relationships.
Therapy and healing
Healthy ways to cope with intrusive fears include seeking professional help from a licensed therapist who specializes in trauma and couples counseling. In therapy, survivors can process their emotions, learn coping skills, and work through past traumas. They can also practice communicating openly and honestly with their partner, expressing their needs and boundaries. With time and effort, survivors can rebuild trust and intimacy in their relationship. By practicing self-care, prioritizing emotional regulation, and developing healthy communication patterns, they can overcome the obstacles of infidelity and build lasting connections.
Survivors of infidelity must take active steps towards healing and moving forward. They should prioritize self-care, seek support, and practice open communication. By facing their fears and working through them with compassion and patience, they can build resilience and cultivate meaningful relationships based on mutual trust and respect.
How do survivors of infidelity manage intrusive fears of betrayal when attempting new intimacy?
Survivors of infidelity may experience intrusive fears of betrayal when attempting new intimacy due to their past experiences. To manage these fears, they can seek therapy or counseling to process their trauma and work on building trust again with their partner. They should also communicate openly about any concerns and boundaries they have regarding intimacy to create a safe space for both parties.