Most veterans have developed coping strategies to deal with the trauma they experienced during combat and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). One common strategy is emotional withdrawal. When a veteran relies too much on this type of coping mechanism, it can cause problems in their personal life, especially in their relationships. Emotional withdrawal involves avoiding situations that might evoke strong feelings and emotions.
Someone who has been through war may withdraw from social situations because they are afraid of being triggered by loud noises, flashbacks, or anger. This can lead to isolation, depression, anxiety, and loneliness. Relationships require communication, intimacy, and vulnerability—all things that become difficult when someone is emotionally withdrawn. Without these key components, relationships suffer, leading to strain and conflict. To move past this, both partners need to understand why emotional withdrawal is happening and what can be done about it. Here's what happens when a veteran's coping strategies—such as emotional withdrawal—no longer serve their relational needs.
When emotional withdrawal becomes a pattern, it creates distance between the two partners. This distance leads to misunderstanding, resentment, and frustration. The partner who is not withdrawing feels like something is wrong, but doesn't know how to communicate or help their loved one heal from PTSD. They may feel hurt, rejected, or lonely. If the other partner does not communicate openly and honestly, it can create even more tension. Both partners need to work together to find ways to break down walls and build trust again. Communicating openly and honestly is essential for any relationship, but it is particularly important when dealing with emotional withdrawal caused by PTSD.
It takes time and effort to rebuild trust in a relationship after emotional withdrawal. It involves talking openly about what happened and why the partner has been withdrawing. It also requires understanding each other's feelings without judgment. Both partners must commit to working together to repair the damage caused by the withdrawal. This means being patient, compassionate, and supportive of each other. Finding professional help is often necessary to address underlying issues that lead to PTSD and emotional withdrawal. Couples counseling can provide guidance and tools for communication, intimacy, and emotional connection.
Both partners need to remember that they are on the same team. They should never give up hope that things will get better if they keep trying. With patience, dedication, and commitment, couples can overcome the challenges presented by PTSD-related emotional withdrawal.
What happens when a veteran's coping strategies—such as emotional withdrawal—no longer serve their relational needs?
When a veteran's coping strategies—such as emotional withdrawal—no longer serve their relational needs, they may experience feelings of isolation, loneliness, depression, anxiety, frustration, and other negative emotions. These feelings can be exacerbated by post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), traumatic brain injury (TBI), substance abuse, or other mental health issues that commonly occur among veterans.