The transition from life as a soldier to civilian can be difficult for many reasons. One particular challenge is rebuilding trust in oneself and one's partner after traumatic experiences during deployment. Sexual abuse, emotional betrayal, and relationship breakdown are common issues among veterans who have served in combat zones. Trust may be broken through infidelity, lies, or other behaviors that undermine intimacy and security.
Rebuilding Trust in Yourself
To rebuild trust in yourself, you should identify the roots of your insecurities and fears related to intimacy. Are there specific events or incidents from your past that make it hard to believe your own desires? Have you been hurt before? Is there a pattern of self-doubt or low self-esteem? Are there beliefs about sex or relationships that keep you feeling guilty or ashamed? Identifying these factors helps you understand what needs healing. You may also need to address trauma responses such as hypervigilance, numbness, or avoidance. Talk therapy, mindfulness meditation, exercise, art therapy, yoga, breathwork, or writing can all help with this process.
Rebuilding Trust in Your Partner
To rebuild trust in your partner, you must first acknowledge their feelings. If they feel hurt or betrayed, they will need time and space to work through those feelings without judgment or criticism. Be honest about your thoughts and intentions regarding sex and intimacy. Practice active listening and empathy. Take responsibility for any mistakes or missteps. Show them that you value their needs and wants through positive actions, including making time together for pleasure and communication. Consider seeking couples' counseling if needed. It's important to remember that trust takes time and effort to rebuild, but it is possible with patience, openness, and vulnerability.
The process of rebuilding trust in oneself and one's partner after deployment requires understanding, communication, patience, and willingness to change. Veterans who commit to these steps are more likely to have healthier and happier relationships over the long term.
How do veterans rebuild trust in themselves and their partners as sexually and emotionally reliable?
Veterans who have experienced trauma can find it difficult to regain a sense of self-trust and build healthy relationships with their romantic partners after returning from military service. The process of rebuilding trust involves addressing past experiences and learning how to manage feelings of distrust, fear, guilt, shame, anger, and other negative emotions related to past experiences.