The subject of this article is the emotional dissonance that occurs when someone who has experienced trauma struggles with feeling close to another person despite wanting it. This can be a difficult issue for many people, as they may have difficulty trusting others or allowing themselves to become vulnerable.
Understanding what causes these feelings and how to manage them is important for healthy relationships.
One cause of emotional dissonance in these situations is anxiety. When someone experiences trauma, their brain may associate closeness with danger, making them feel anxious or scared when trying to connect with someone else. This fear can make it hard to allow oneself to be open and honest about one's feelings, creating a barrier between partners. In addition, shame or guilt about past behavior related to the trauma can also lead to avoidance of intimate situations.
Another cause is low self-esteem. People who have been through trauma may believe that they are unworthy of love or attention, which makes it difficult to form meaningful connections with others. They may struggle with negative thoughts about themselves or doubt their ability to meet the needs of their partner. As a result, they may push their partner away or withdraw from the relationship altogether.
Some individuals may experience physical responses such as sweating, rapid heart rate, or shallow breathing when attempting to connect emotionally. These symptoms are often due to the body's fight or flight response being triggered by an association between closeness and danger. These reactions can make it hard to relax and enjoy time with loved ones, leading to further isolation and distance.
Managing emotional dissonance requires work but can be done. First, it's essential to acknowledge that this is an issue and seek professional help if needed. A therapist can provide support and guidance on managing anxiety and addressing underlying issues causing the problem. Secondly, practicing mindfulness and meditation techniques can help ground oneself in the present moment, reducing the power of triggers from the past.
Engaging in activities together such as exercise, hobbies, or group activities can provide distraction while building trust and connection.
Understanding and managing emotional dissonance can take effort and awareness. But by working through these challenges, those affected can build healthier relationships that allow them to feel safe, secure, and supported.
What forms of emotional dissonance emerge when a veteran intellectually desires closeness but physically resists due to trauma responses?
The presence of emotional dissonance can manifest in various ways for a veteran who experiences physical resistance towards closeness despite intellectual desire. This may be attributed to the individual's past military experience, which has led them to develop certain coping mechanisms that are no longer necessary in civilian life. As a result, they may find it difficult to overcome their conditioned responses and allow themselves to become emotionally vulnerable.