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WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SHAME AND GUILT? A PSYCHOLOGIST EXPLAINS

Shame is an uncomfortable feeling that can arise when one's sense of self is perceived to be flawed or deficient in some way. It typically involves a focus on the self and a desire for social acceptance or approval, leading to feelings of disconnection and humiliation. In contrast, guilt refers to a feeling of responsibility or remorse for actions or behaviors that have caused harm to others. While shame and guilt may share similarities, they also differ significantly in terms of their psychological impact and potential pathways to healing.

Shame has been identified as a key factor in identity-based trauma such as childhood abuse, bullying, and discrimination, which often involve significant violations of personal boundaries and attacks on a person's sense of worth and belonging. Shame is often associated with negative self-evaluations and self-criticism, and can lead to depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues.

It is important to note that shame does not necessarily mean that someone is bad or wrong; rather, it arises from a belief that something about oneself is unworthy or defective.

Guilt focuses more on specific behaviors or choices rather than on an individual's inherent value or worth. Guilt tends to prompt reflection on how to make amends or correct mistakes, while shame often leads to avoidance and self-blame. This difference in focus can make shame particularly difficult to overcome, as it can create a sense of hopelessness and a lack of agency over one's own experiences.

Despite these differences, both shame and guilt are forms of internalized distress that require effective coping strategies to resolve. Therapies such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and mindfulness meditation can be helpful for addressing both feelings by challenging negative thought patterns and promoting acceptance and compassion towards the self.

Support groups and peer counseling can provide validation and perspective from others who have shared similar experiences.

Understanding the differences between shame and guilt can help individuals with identity-based trauma develop greater insight into their emotional responses and improve their overall wellbeing. By acknowledging and accepting past experiences without self-judgment, they may find new paths toward healing and empowerment.

How does the psychological experience of shame differ from guilt in identity-based trauma?

Shame is an intensely personal, internalized feeling of inadequacy, embarrassment, and humiliation that can be caused by various factors such as social comparison, criticism, rejection, failure, and perceived faults. It has been linked to low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and interpersonal difficulties.

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