Partnering With Unstable Emotions
As military personnel return from deployment, they may experience significant changes to their physical health, mental health, and social interactions. These changes can lead to instability in moods and behaviors, which can be challenging for partners to navigate. One way that partners can support their service member during this time is through sustained relational engagement. This involves being present, attentive, and engaged in communication, even when emotional outbursts occur. It also requires creating structured opportunities for connection, such as regular date nights or shared activities.
Couples should focus on positive reinforcement, active listening, and open communication about needs and feelings. By working together to maintain relational engagement, partners can help their service members heal and reconnect after deployment.
Communication Tips
Communication is key to sustaining relational engagement during unpredictable times. Here are some tips to help partners communicate effectively with their service member:
* Be patient: Recognize that your service member may struggle to express themselves emotionally, and avoid interrupting them.
* Listen actively: Show interest in what your partner is saying by asking questions and repeating back what you heard.
* Practice nonverbal cues: Use eye contact, hand gestures, facial expressions, and body language to convey understanding.
* Avoid conflict: Try not to argue over disagreements or criticize your partner's behavior. Instead, work together to find solutions.
* Seek support: If things get too tense, take a break and seek outside support from friends, family, or therapists.
Shared Activities
Shared activities can provide structure and routine during uncertain times. Some ideas include taking a class together, going for walks, cooking meals, or watching movies. These activities create space for intimacy and connection without requiring extensive conversation. Partners can also try novel experiences like attending events, trying new restaurants, or traveling to different places. This can spark creativity and excitement while building stronger bonds between the couple.
Positive Reinforcement
Positive reinforcement helps build confidence and motivates both partners to keep working towards a healthy relationship. It involves recognizing and praising positive behaviors, even when they seem small.
"I appreciate how hard you've been working on your mental health" or "Thank you for sharing your feelings with me." Partners should also recognize each other's efforts to maintain relational engagement, such as scheduling date nights or participating in shared activities. By celebrating progress, partners show their commitment to each other and encourage continued growth.
Overall Strategies
Sustaining relational engagement requires consistent effort and flexibility. Here are some overall strategies that may help partners navigate unpredictable emotions:
* Stay connected: Even if your service member is struggling, stay engaged by checking in regularly and asking questions about their day.
* Create rituals: Develop regular routines that bring comfort and stability to the relationship.
* Avoid isolation: Make sure you have social support outside of your partner, whether from friends, family, or therapists.
* Set boundaries: Don't let negative behavior slide, but don't withdraw entirely either. Instead, set clear expectations and consequences.
By practicing these strategies, partners can sustain relational engagement through even the most challenging times. With patience, empathy, and dedication, couples can work together to rebuild after deployment and create a stronger bond than before.
How do partners sustain relational engagement when soldiers' post-deployment emotional state is unpredictable or volatile?
Partners play an essential role in maintaining relational engagement during deployment by providing support, encouragement, and understanding for their partner's emotional needs. They can also help them cope with stressors such as family conflicts, financial struggles, and health issues. Partners should keep communication channels open and offer empathetic listening skills to their partners. Additionally, they should seek professional help if needed and be aware of the signs of mental illness.