The ability to connect emotionally is essential for romantic relationships, but it can be challenging for soldiers who have experienced traumatic events during their service. Trauma can cause changes in emotional responsiveness, attachment styles, and relationship expectations that make intimate relationships difficult to navigate. This article will discuss how trauma affects these areas of life and provide strategies for managing them.
Emotional Responsiveness
Traumatic experiences can alter a person's emotional responses to situations, making it hard to express feelings accurately or recognize and respond appropriately to others' emotions.
Some veterans may feel numb or disconnected from their emotions, while others may experience intense, uncontrollable reactions. These changes can impact both personal and professional relationships and create tension and misunderstandings between partners. To manage this challenge, soldiers can practice mindfulness exercises such as deep breathing or meditation to become more aware of their own emotions and communicate them clearly to others. They can also seek support from therapists who specialize in trauma treatment.
Attachment Styles
Trauma can also change a person's attachment style, which affects how they form and maintain close relationships. Some veterans may avoid close bonds out of fear of being hurt again, while others may cling too tightly to partners or have trouble trusting them. Avoidant attachment styles can lead to conflicts over closeness and distance, while anxious attachment can result in controlling or needy behavior. To address these issues, couples can work with a therapist to build secure attachments based on trust, open communication, and mutual respect.
Relational Expectations
Trauma can alter relationship expectations, causing confusion or conflict about roles and responsibilities within the relationship.
Soldiers may struggle with intimacy because they are used to working independently or may have trouble accepting support from partners. They may also hold unrealistic expectations for relationships that stem from their experiences in combat. It is essential for couples to discuss and negotiate these differences early on and set realistic goals for the relationship. They can also work together to develop shared values and interests outside of military life.
How do soldiers navigate intimacy when trauma has altered emotional responsiveness, attachment, or relational expectations?
One of the main challenges that soldiers face is reconnecting with loved ones after being away for extended periods of time. This can be particularly difficult if they have experienced trauma while on deployment, as it may have affected their emotional responsiveness and attachment to others. Additionally, military service often involves adapting to new environments and cultures, which can influence how soldiers view relationships and what they expect from them.