Cognitive Dissonance is the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, values, or attitudes. It often occurs when people hold conflicting views or feel that their behaviour does not match up to what they believe or value.
If someone believes smoking is bad but enjoys smoking cigarettes, this creates a conflict between their beliefs and their actions which causes them discomfort. Cognitive dissonance can be experienced by adolescents who consume media that presents unrealistic romantic relationships and then struggle to find similarities in real life relationships.
Media like films, TV shows, books, magazines, and social media present idealized versions of romantic relationships. These depictions usually involve passionate, effortless love stories that are filled with grand gestures and perfect moments.
Most teenage relationships are much more messy and ambiguous. They may include fights, breakups, infidelity, and other issues that do not fit into the romantic illusions created by media. This discrepancy between what teens have been told about love and what they experience in their own lives can cause cognitive dissonance. The idealized portrayal of love makes it hard for them to accept the reality of imperfect relationships. Adolescents may also compare themselves and their partners to the "perfect" couples they see in media, leading to feelings of dissatisfaction and disappointment.
One way that media fosters these romantic illusions is through the use of stock characters. In movies and TV shows, characters are often stereotyped as either perfect lovers or hopelessly flawed individuals. The "bad boy" always gets the girl, even though he lacks empathy or responsibility. The "damsel in distress" always needs saving, no matter how independent she may seem. These stock characters create an unrealistic view of relationships and make it difficult for teenagers to accept anything less than perfection. As a result, adolescents may feel that they need to conform to these types to find love or that real-life relationships cannot measure up.
Media often presents false narratives about relationships.
Many films show couples getting together instantly without any conflict or tension.
Real-life relationships usually involve significant communication, compromise, and effort. Teenage relationships require work, time, and commitment, which is rarely presented in media. By presenting relationships as easy and drama-free, media creates false expectations and leads adolescents to believe that anything else would be "wrong."
The cognitive dissonance created by media can have negative consequences. It can lead to relationship anxiety and self-criticism. Adolescents may worry that they are not good enough for their partner or that their own relationships will never match up to those in media. They may become frustrated when their partners do not live up to the idealized standards set by media, leading to arguments and breakups. Alternatively, they may give up on finding love altogether because it seems like too much work compared to what media depicts.
To avoid cognitive dissonance, teenagers should seek out more realistic representations of romantic relationships. This includes shows and books that present more complex characters and stories. Media portrayals should also include messy moments and problems rather than just happy endings.
Teens should remember that real-life relationships take effort and commitment. No one is perfect, and no relationship is always going to feel like a fairytale. Accepting this reality can help them enjoy their current relationships while being patient with imperfections.
How do media‑fostered romantic illusions create cognitive dissonance for adolescents when actual relationships are ambiguous or messy?
Adolescent's perception of love is often influenced by media portrayals that present an idealized version of romantic relationships. When real-life encounters don't match up with these expectations, they may experience cognitive dissonance as their belief system clashes with reality.