One of the most challenging aspects of being a soldier is striking a balance between following orders and maintaining personal relationships. On one hand, military personnel must be able to follow orders without hesitation, even when those orders are morally questionable. This requires a high degree of emotional self-control. On the other hand, however, many soldiers long for the emotional connection they have left behind when they enlist. They crave companionship, intimacy, and love, just like everyone else. How do soldiers manage to reconcile these opposing desires?
The answer lies in their training. Military training emphasizes discipline, obedience, and restraint above all else. Soldiers learn early on that they must never allow their emotions to interfere with their duty as a member of the armed forces. This means suppressing feelings of sadness, fear, anger, jealousy, and desire. It also means avoiding distractions that could impair their focus or decision-making abilities. As a result, soldiers develop a habit of keeping their feelings bottled up, often until they explode in a volcanic eruption of emotion later down the road.
But the need for emotional connection remains strong. Many soldiers find ways to connect with others despite their training. Some seek out fellow soldiers who share similar interests, creating friendships based on mutual understanding. Others engage in recreational activities such as sports or artistic pursuits, which provide an outlet for emotional expression. Still, others turn to online dating or casual hookups to satisfy their needs for physical intimacy and companionship.
Soldiers must learn how to balance their need for closeness with their training. They may find themselves caught between two worlds: the one where they are expected to be cold and unemotional, and the other where they long for warmth and connection. The key is finding a middle ground that allows them to maintain their professionalism while still expressing their humanity. This can be difficult, but it is essential if they want to remain healthy and functional both on and off the battlefield.
How do soldiers reconcile the desire for emotional closeness with training that emphasizes emotional control?
Soldiers may feel conflicted about their need for emotional closeness with others while also undergoing training designed to promote emotional detachment. This can be particularly challenging when they are deployed on active duty away from family and friends.