When you are away from home fighting wars, it is natural to feel lonely and miss your loved ones.
Soldiers often find themselves unable to express their feelings openly due to societal norms that stigmatize emotional vulnerability. This creates a tension between the desire for emotional closeness and the fear of being seen as weak, which can lead to relational ambivalence. Here's how they cope with this dilemma:
1. Coping through humor: Many soldiers turn to humor to cope with the pressure of relational ambivalence. They might make jokes about their situation or share funny stories to keep themselves lighthearted. This can help them maintain a sense of distance while still connecting with others emotionally.
2. Focus on the mission: Soldiers also try to focus on their work and training to distract themselves from their personal lives. The sense of purpose and camaraderie provided by military service helps alleviate some of the isolation caused by relational ambivalence.
3. Relationships with fellow soldiers: Some soldiers form close bonds with other soldiers who understand what they're going through. These relationships provide an outlet for emotions that cannot be expressed in traditional romantic relationships.
4. Phone calls and letters: Keeping in touch with family members through phone calls and letters can help soldiers stay connected even when they are far apart. While these interactions may not replace physical intimacy, they can help soldiers feel less isolated.
5. Distance: For some soldiers, distance is the only way to manage relational ambivalence. They may avoid forming close relationships altogether or engage in brief encounters that don't require much emotional investment.
Soldiers face a unique set of challenges in managing their emotional needs during times of conflict. By using different coping strategies like humor, focusing on the mission, building relationships with fellow soldiers, maintaining contact with loved ones, and embracing temporary solutions like distance, they can navigate this difficult time without sacrificing their mental health.
How do soldiers cope with relational ambivalence caused by simultaneous longing for emotional closeness and fear of vulnerability?
Relational ambivalence is a common experience among military personnel that arises from the desire for emotional closeness with their loved ones while simultaneously being aware of the potential risks associated with opening up emotionally. This can lead to feelings of fear, anxiety, and even guilt when engaging in close relationships, which can cause soldiers to withdraw and become more isolated.