The concept of collective trauma is becoming increasingly popular in psychological research and clinical practice to explain how individuals may be affected by catastrophic events that impact large groups of people, such as natural disasters, wars, pandemics, and genocides.
Less attention has been paid to how these experiences affect interpersonal relationships, particularly between romantic partners. This paper explores the ways in which collective traumas can shape couple-level emotional strategies and provide insight into the potential long-term consequences for relationship stability and health.
Theoretical Framework
Collective trauma refers to the shared experience of an event or situation that causes severe distress, fear, and helplessness among members of a community or group. These experiences can create profound changes in individual mental and physical well-being and can lead to a range of short- and long-term effects, including anxiety, depression, posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and other psychological symptoms. Research suggests that exposure to collective trauma also shapes relationship dynamics, often leading to increased conflict, decreased satisfaction, and higher rates of divorce.
One theoretical framework that has been applied to understand this phenomenon is attachment theory, which posits that humans are biologically predisposed to seek closeness and intimacy with others as a means of survival. In times of crisis, the need for safety and security becomes even more critical, leading to heightened attachment needs. When couples face collective trauma together, they must navigate new challenges and uncertainties that can strain their bond and test their ability to remain connected.
Emotional Strategies
Approach/avoidance behaviors
When faced with a perceived threat, individuals may adopt different emotional strategies to regulate their responses. Some people engage in approach behavior, seeking out social support and connection to manage their feelings and cope with stressors. Others may adopt avoidance behavior, withdrawing from social interaction and isolating themselves from others. Collective trauma can trigger these reactions in both individuals and couples, leading to differences in how partners respond emotionally.
One partner may be more open and expressive about their feelings, while the other may become closed off and distant.
These patterns can create tension and distance within the relationship.
Emotion regulation
Collective traumas can also impact how partners regulate their own emotions and those of their partner. Individuals who have experienced a trauma may struggle to control their emotions or may be hyper-sensitive to cues from others, leading to increased conflict and misunderstandings within the relationship.
Each person may have unique coping mechanisms that they rely on to manage their emotions, which may not always align with their partner's preferences. This disconnect can create additional stress and undermine efforts at maintaining emotional intimacy.
Attachment styles
Collective trauma can shape attachment styles and security in relationships. Couples may experience increased anxiety, mistrust, and fear after a shared trauma, making it difficult to feel secure and stable within the relationship. These effects can persist over time and may contribute to relationship dysfunction and breakdown. By understanding the ways in which collective trauma influences couple-level emotional strategies, clinicians can better support individuals and promote healthy, resilient relationships.
Clinical Implications
Practitioners working with couples affected by collective trauma should prioritize assessing the impact of the event on individual and relational functioning. They may use techniques such as empathic listening, validation, and reframing to help partners communicate effectively and understand one another's experiences. Therapists may also emphasize the importance of self-care, encouraging partners to take breaks when needed and engage in activities that promote relaxation and wellness. Through targeted interventions, clinicians can provide practical tools for managing feelings and building resilience in the face of collective traumas.
How does the experience of collective trauma influence couple-level emotional strategies?
In times of collective trauma such as war, disaster, or pandemic, couples often experience intense emotions that can have significant impact on their relationship dynamics. Collective traumas may cause feelings of fear, anxiety, grief, guilt, and shame which can lead to increased conflict within the relationship. Couples who experience shared trauma may find it difficult to communicate effectively due to feelings of vulnerability and powerlessness.