Different types of relationships can produce different types of emotional labor for those involved.
Heterosexual military couples may face specific challenges related to their respective roles within the relationship, such as when one partner is deployed or on duty while the other remains home.
There are also unique challenges that arise from being part of an LGBT military couple. In this context, emotional labor can manifest differently than in a heterosexual relationship due to differences in societal expectations and cultural norms regarding gender roles.
It's important to define what emotional labor means. Emotional labor refers to the work people do to present themselves in certain ways to create a particular impression on others. This includes things like smiling and making small talk in social situations or acting happy even when they don't feel that way. It can also involve managing one's own feelings and expressing them appropriately to avoid upsetting others. In LGBT military relationships, this type of labor can be particularly difficult because of societal expectations around gender roles.
If a female soldier falls in love with another female soldier, they may face additional emotional labor related to breaking down gender stereotypes. They may need to deal with questions about why they didn't choose a more traditional male-female relationship, which can lead to added pressure to justify their choice and maintain the appearance of happiness. Similarly, a male soldier who is dating a fellow male soldier may have to navigate conversations about his sexuality and masculinity, both of which are often seen as tied to a person's ability to perform traditional gender roles.
LGBT couples may experience discrimination or prejudice based on their sexual orientation, which can add further stress to their relationship.
They may be denied housing or benefits because of their partnership status, creating an added layer of emotional labor as they attempt to address these issues.
There are also unique challenges associated with being part of a same-sex couple in the military. Military life requires frequent relocation, which can disrupt personal and professional networks for those involved. It can also make it harder to form new connections and find support systems. As a result, LGBT military couples may require more emotional work than heterosexual couples to create and maintain close friendships and community ties.
The nature of military service itself creates specific demands that don't apply to civilian relationships. Soldiers must adhere to strict rules and protocols, including regulations around fraternization between members of different ranks or units. This can place extra pressure on LGBT couples, as they must navigate a sometimes hostile environment while trying to present themselves as professional soldiers first and romantic partners second.
The emotional labor required by LGBT military couples is complex and varied, but it differs from that of heterosexual couples due to societal expectations around gender roles and cultural norms related to sexuality.
How does emotional labor manifest differently in LGBT military relationships compared to heterosexual relationships?
Emotional labor refers to the process of managing feelings and expressing emotions that are appropriate for social situations (Goffman, 1956). It includes monitoring one's behavior, words, and tone to convey an expected emotion while concealing other emotions. In LGBT relationships, emotional labor may be more intense due to societal stigma surrounding same-sex relationships.