How do soldiers reconcile relational longing with avoidance strategies formed for survival?
Soldiers must be adept at both emotional self-regulation and social skills to ensure their own safety while serving in the military.
These same traits can make it difficult for them to maintain healthy romantic relationships after returning home. One strategy that many soldiers employ is avoiding intimate connections altogether, which can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation.
Soldiers may find themselves struggling to open up about their experiences and form close bonds with others due to the stress and trauma they have experienced during deployment. This often leads to feelings of disconnection and detachment from family members and loved ones. In addition, soldiers who serve multiple tours of duty may develop a sense of numbness towards physical and emotional intimacy, making it difficult for them to connect on a deeper level with partners back home.
Another avoidance strategy that soldiers may engage in is suppressing their emotions and bottling up negative feelings related to their time in combat. This can lead to problems such as depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), substance abuse, or other mental health issues. These issues can further hinder a soldier's ability to establish meaningful relationships outside of the military.
Some soldiers turn to alcohol or drugs to cope with these difficulties, leading to addiction or legal troubles. Others may engage in promiscuous behavior or seek out unhealthy relationships as a way to feel connected and desired by others. While this may provide temporary relief, it ultimately does more harm than good in terms of long-term relationship satisfaction.
To address these challenges, many veterans turn to therapy or support groups where they can discuss their experiences and learn new coping strategies. With the help of professional guidance, some soldiers are able to work through their past traumas and reconnect with loved ones.
The road to recovery is often long and arduous, requiring patience and commitment from both parties involved.
Building healthy relationships after service requires honest communication, self-awareness, and willingness to work together to overcome obstacles. By being open about one's needs and desires, soldiers can create a foundation for lasting connections that will help them heal from the wounds of war.
How do soldiers reconcile relational longing with avoidance strategies formed for survival?
Soldiers experience an emotional conflict between their desire to form meaningful relationships and the need to maintain distance from others as a result of the traumatic experiences they encounter during military service. They may engage in various avoidance strategies such as distancing themselves emotionally from their loved ones, suppressing their feelings, or focusing on tasks at hand to cope with the stress of deployment and combat.