Sexuality and intimacy have always been part of human experience since early times.
They have been different from one culture to another, depending on social, economic, political, geographical, religious, and historical factors. In general terms, they can be defined as a form of expression of love that involves emotional, physical, psychological, intellectual, spiritual, and sexual interactions between individuals that create an intense connection. These relations can take place between people who are romantic partners, friends, family members, colleagues, acquaintances, or strangers. Sexuality is a natural instinct that has evolved through time, while intimacy is a construct created by society. This means that it's more cultural than biological. Intimacy is also a concept of closeness, which includes verbal and non-verbal communication that goes beyond sex. It requires trust and vulnerability because it implies disclosing secrets and desires without fear of rejection.
Existential threats such as war, famine, illness, poverty, discrimination, violence, racism, homophobia, transphobia, etc., affect the way humans interact with each other. When there's a constant threat to life, these concepts change, and what was considered normal becomes abnormal. Existential threats can make people feel insecure about their bodies, lives, relationships, future, and surroundings. As a result, sex and intimacy become essential for survival, but they do not necessarily imply passion, pleasure, desire, or fulfillment. They become more transactional than relational, so they don't involve strong bonds, affection, or even safety. The experience of intimacy may change from moment to moment due to unpredictable circumstances that influence decision making and behavior. People may have short-term relationships based on needs rather than long-term commitments.
Sexual interactions are usually driven by hormones and impulses that overwhelm rational thinking; however, when existence is threatened, individuals focus more on practical matters than emotions. The body prioritizes physical functions over mental ones to respond to imminent danger, and this affects sexual behaviors.
Rape victims during wartime often don't remember who hurt them and how it happened. Their minds block out those memories to protect their psyche. The same happens with women who must engage in transactions for food or shelter. In some cultures, women trade sex for protection or favor because they need resources, and they lose autonomy. This means that intimacy is less important than survival, and it doesn't involve trust or vulnerability.
When existential threats are present, humans seek stability through routines, habits, and comforting rituals. Sex becomes part of the daily routine to avoid loneliness or stress relief without involving passion or sensuality. Intimacy is about understanding each other's situation, showing empathy, providing support, and ensuring security. It involves communication, honesty, care, and respect for each other's needs.
When there's no time or energy left, these qualities become secondary. People don't talk openly about problems because there's no point in sharing if you cannot find a solution together. They look for partners who can help them survive instead of companionship, affection, or love. Therefore, relationships based on intimacy may change from month to month depending on the circumstances.
Existential threats transform sexuality and intimacy into transactional interactions rather than relational experiences. When life is at stake, individuals prioritize pragmatic issues over romantic ones. They focus on practical solutions rather than pleasure, connection, or fulfillment. As a result, sex and intimacy are not necessarily an expression of desire, passion, tenderness, or safety but a way to protect themselves from fear.
How is intimacy experienced differently in contexts where existential threats are constant?
In contexts where existential threats are constant, intimacy can be experienced as an act of defiance against the threat or as a means of coping with it. Intimacy provides a sense of safety and belonging that can be particularly valuable when life feels unpredictable and uncertain. It can also help people feel connected to something larger than themselves and gain perspective on their situation.