The issue of social conformity has been an important topic in sociology since the early days of the discipline. From Emile Durkheim's study of suicide to Erving Goffman's analysis of the presentation of self, scholars have sought to understand how individuals interact with others and the social environment. In this essay, I will explore the idea that conformity can have negative consequences when it comes to our ability to form authentic and meaningful relationships. Specifically, I will examine how the need to fit in with social norms can lead to superficial and even damaging behaviors that undermine our personal integrity and well-being.
Conformity is often seen as a necessary part of human existence. We are social creatures who need to cooperate with others in order to survive and thrive.
There are many instances where conformity becomes more important than individual expression or exploration.
Consider the case of sexuality. Many people feel pressure to act in ways that may be unnatural or counterintuitive simply because they believe that this is what society expects of them. This pressure can lead to feelings of shame, anxiety, and even depression. It can also prevent individuals from exploring their true desires and needs, leading to a lack of fulfillment and satisfaction.
One way to illustrate this point is through the concept of the "closet." The closet refers to a metaphorical space where gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered people hide their true identities in order to avoid stigma and discrimination. While some people choose to come out of the closet and live openly, others remain closeted for fear of rejection and violence. This choice has profound effects on their mental health and well-being, as they must constantly monitor their behavior and speech to ensure that they do not reveal their true identity. Similarly, those who engage in consensual non-monogamy or BDSM relationships may face judgment and condemnation from family, friends, and colleagues, forcing them into the closet as well.
Another example of the negative consequences of conformity is the phenomenon of "slut shaming." Slut shaming occurs when women (and sometimes men) are criticized or ostracized for having sex outside of traditional norms. This can include anything from promiscuous behavior to premarital sex to public displays of affection. The result is that many individuals feel pressured to limit their sexual expression in order to fit in with social expectations. This can be particularly damaging for young people, who may internalize messages about how much sex is appropriate or acceptable. In turn, they may struggle to form meaningful connections based on mutual trust and respect.
Then, conformity can have significant costs when it comes to our ability to connect with others on an authentic level. By suppressing our desires and needs, we risk losing touch with what truly makes us happy and fulfilled. We also risk losing our personal integrity, becoming a version of ourselves that is not true to who we really are. While some degree of conformity is necessary for survival, it should never become so important that we lose sight of our own needs and wants.
What is the ethical cost of conforming to social norms for the sake of acceptance?
The ethical costs of conforming to social norms for the sake of acceptance can be both personal and societal. Individuals who follow socially accepted behavior may experience feelings of guilt, shame, or regret when they do not align with their personal values. This can lead to decreased self-esteem, anxiety, and depression.