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THE ETHICS OF BISEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS: UNDERSTANDING DESIRE, SEXUAL ORIENTATION AND PHILOSOPHY

4 min read Bisexual

Bisexuality is defined as being attracted to both men and women. It is a sexual orientation that has been increasingly recognized in recent years.

There are still many misconceptions about it, including the idea that people who identify as bisexual cannot truly be monogamous because they experience attraction to multiple genders. This view reflects an assumption that bisexuals have conflicting desires and must choose between them, which can create ethical tensions within their relationships.

Society may expect them to conform to heteronormative patterns of behavior, such as settling down with one partner, despite the fact that bisexuals often experience greater fluidity than those in traditional monogamous relationships. This raises questions about how bisexual desire fits into wider societal norms and how philosophy might help us understand these issues. In this article, I will examine three key frameworks for understanding bisexual desire, its potential benefits, and challenges.

Autonomy: The first framework for understanding bisexual desire is autonomy. According to this approach, individuals should pursue their own interests without external pressure or coercion. Autonomous individuals have free will and are able to make decisions based on their own values and desires.

This approach assumes that individuals are isolated from social forces and pressures, which may not always be true for bisexuals. Bisexuals may face discrimination, stigma, and oppression that limit their ability to act autonomously.

They may feel pressure to hide their sexuality due to fear of being judged or attacked. This can lead to feelings of shame or guilt that impact their ability to explore their attractions fully. Autonomy also assumes that all individuals are capable of self-reflection and introspection, but bisexuals may struggle with internalized homophobia or biphobia that affects their perception of themselves and their desires.

Relationality: A second framework is relationality. This approach emphasizes the importance of interpersonal connections and recognizes that people's identities are shaped by their relationships with others. Relational approaches highlight the ways in which power dynamics, expectations, and cultural contexts influence our desires and behavior. For bisexuals, this means acknowledging the complex dynamics of polyamory or monogamy within a relationship, as well as the impact of societal norms on their choices. It also suggests that bisexuals may need to negotiate multiple identities and navigate diverse communities to find support and validation for their desires. While relationality recognizes the fluid nature of desire, it still assumes that individuals have some control over their behavior and decision-making.

Societal Expectations: The third framework is societal expectations. In this view, society sets boundaries and rules for what constitutes acceptable behavior and relationships. These expectations often reflect heteronormative patterns, such as the assumption that couples will be monogamous or that certain types of behavior are taboo. Bisexuality challenges these assumptions because it rejects binary gender roles and promotes fluidity and openness.

Bisexuals may face criticism or exclusion if they do not conform to these expectations. They may feel pressure to hide their attractions from family, friends, or colleagues to avoid stigma or discrimination. Societal expectations can also create tension between self-fulfillment and social acceptance, leading to conflict within the individual.

Philosophical Approaches: Philosophy offers several frameworks for understanding these ethical tensions. One approach is utilitarianism, which prioritizes maximizing happiness and minimizing suffering. Utilitarianism suggests that bisexuals should act in ways that promote pleasure and reduce pain, but it does not always consider the long-term consequences of their actions.

A bisexual may choose monogamy with one partner to please them, even though this goes against their true desires. A second approach is virtue ethics, which emphasizes cultivating virtues such as honesty, integrity, and compassion. This approach would encourage bisexuals to explore their desires honestly and communicate openly with partners about their needs and preferences. It recognizes the complexity of desire and the need for ongoing negotiation within relationships.

There is deontological ethics, which focuses on following moral rules and obligations. This approach might suggest that bisexuals have an obligation to be truthful with partners about their desires and act accordingly, regardless of societal expectations.

Bisexual desire raises complex ethical issues around autonomy, relationality, and societal expectations. These tensions reflect broader questions about gender, sexuality, and power dynamics in society. Philosophy can help us understand these issues by providing frameworks for decision-making and reflection.

Bisexual individuals must also grapple with their own internal conflicts, external pressures, and community norms when exploring their desires. By acknowledging the challenges they face, we can create spaces for greater understanding, acceptance, and support.

How does bisexual desire illuminate ethical tensions between autonomy, relationality, and societal expectations, and what frameworks can philosophy offer to address these tensions?

Bisexual individuals experience unique challenges when it comes to navigating their sexual desires due to the intersection of societal expectations, personal autonomy, and interpersonal relationships. While society often prescribes that one should choose either heterosexuality or homosexuality, bisexuals are left with the task of reconciling both options.

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