The return from military duty is often marked by an emotional reunion with loved ones after weeks or months apart.
For some people who have been away on deployment, this joyous occasion can be complicated by feelings of unease as they struggle to adjust back into civilian life. One particular area where these difficulties may manifest themselves is within romantic relationships, particularly when partners have spent time together while one partner was deployed. This phenomenon has become known as "reintegration discomfort" and refers to how service members navigate the awkwardness that accompanies resuming their former roles as lovers, spouses, or partners in the wake of major life changes.
During deployment, relationships undergo significant shifts due to extended periods without physical contact between partners and the stressful experiences faced while away. In contrast, life continues on without them at home, including changing jobs, moving residences, getting promotions, developing new hobbies, forming new friendships, etc., all of which can make it difficult for returning servicemen and women to fit back into their old routines seamlessly.
Being separated from family during deployment can lead to changes in expectations about what constitutes "normal" behavior within a relationship, potentially creating conflict if partners are unable to reconcile their disparate viewpoints upon meeting again.
Suppose a soldier has been gone for six months and returns to find that his partner has developed a habit of leaving dishes out overnight or staying up late watching television until early morning hours. The soldier might feel unsettled by this change because he had previously expected his partner to follow certain rules regarding chores and bedtime, but now those norms no longer apply. Similarly, if the partner has started dating someone else during the absence, reintegration can be even more challenging since jealousy or other negative feelings may arise between them instead of excitement about reuniting with each other.
These difficulties do not only affect romantic partnerships; they also extend to platonic ones such as friendship trios where one member was absent while others kept up regular communication. If two friends suddenly start discussing topics off-limits before the missing person's return, it can create tension when the third arrives. Service members often struggle to adjust after returning due to these situations since they must relearn social norms outside of military life and figure out how best to navigate them without prior experience. They must also manage their own emotions related to missed opportunities during service so as not to project anger onto loved ones who were left behind.
It is crucial for service members to prepare themselves mentally and emotionally for reintegrating into relationships back home. This means having honest conversations beforehand about expectations, making an effort to maintain communication throughout deployment (even if it is just occasional), being patient with any changes in routines once reunited, and practicing forgiveness towards those involved. With patience and understanding on both sides, couples can work through reintegration discomfort quickly and move forward positively.
How do service members navigate the discomfort of returning to relationships that have evolved independently in their absence?
Upon returning home from deployment, military personnel often find themselves having to reconnect with family and friends who have been navigating their lives without them for extended periods of time. This can be an uncomfortable experience as they may feel like outsiders and struggle to catch up on important events that occurred during their absence. Service members may also face difficulties adjusting to new routines and dynamics within these relationships, such as changes in roles or responsibilities among family members.