What is Relational Dissonance?
Relational dissonance refers to the feeling that occurs when someone experiences conflict between their emotions and beliefs about a particular relationship, situation, or circumstance. This can lead to feelings of discomfort, frustration, confusion, and tension. When it comes to relationships, this type of dissonance can be particularly challenging because it often involves conflicting desires and expectations from both partners.
Trauma and Operational Stress
When partners experience trauma or operational stress, they may feel emotionally distant, anxious, or unfulfilled. They may also struggle to express themselves authentically and openly. These feelings can create relational dissonance, wherein one partner feels a lack of connection while the other feels an excess of pressure or expectation.
If one partner has experienced physical or sexual abuse, they may have difficulty trusting their partner and opening up sexually. This can cause a rift in the relationship and make intimacy difficult. Similarly, if one partner works long hours or is away from home for extended periods, they may feel guilty for not spending enough time with their partner and worry that their partner resents them. This can lead to tension and conflict.
Institutional Norms
Institutional norms refer to cultural values and social conventions that influence how people interact with each other in society. In many cases, these norms are based on traditional gender roles and power dynamics, which can create additional layers of conflict within a relationship.
Some societies place more emphasis on men being providers and women being caretakers, leading to tensions when one partner struggles financially or takes on greater responsibility at work.
Cultural norms around sex and sexuality can create barriers to healthy communication and expression, making it harder for partners to connect emotionally and physically.
Emotional and Sexual Needs
Emotional and sexual needs are central to any healthy relationship. When one partner's needs aren't met, this can lead to frustration and resentment. Partners who experience relational dissonance due to trauma, operational stress, or institutional norms must find ways to communicate openly and authentically about their desires and expectations. One way to do this is by engaging in regular check-ins where both parties express their feelings and concerns without judgment. This helps to create a space for understanding and compassion rather than blame or criticism. It also allows partners to identify areas where they need support and adjust their behavior accordingly.
How do partners manage relational dissonance when trauma, operational stress, and institutional norms conflict with emotional and sexual needs?
Relationship dissension is a complex problem that can occur due to various factors such as trauma, operational stress, and institutional norms conflicting with emotional and sexual needs. To effectively manage this type of situation, partners need to have open communication with each other to understand their perspectives and feelings. Both individuals must be willing to compromise and find solutions that meet both their needs.