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SEXUAL EXCLUSIVITY VS. BISEXUALITY: CHALLENGING THE LOGIC OF FIDELITY AND INTIMACY IN RELATIONSHIPS

3 min read Bisexual

Sexual desire is often represented as binary; either homosexual or heterosexual. But what happens when someone identifies as bisexual? Bisexuals occupy an ambiguous position between these poles, challenging the neat categorization of human attraction. This has implications for how we think about sexual ethics, which are typically constructed around exclusivity. In this essay, I will explore how bisexuality disrupts the logic of exclusion that structures sexual and relational ethics.

Let's consider how monogamy is defined in terms of sexual exclusivity. Monogamous couples agree to be romantically and sexually exclusive with each other, setting boundaries around their physical intimacy.

If one partner feels attracted to another person, they may struggle to maintain fidelity within this contract.

Imagine John and Jane are married but John falls in love with a colleague named Samantha. In a heteronormative worldview, he is forced to choose between his wife and his new lover. The idea of choosing between two people can cause emotional distress, as it implies making sacrifices or betrayal.

Bisexuals do not conform to traditional ideas about sexual exclusivity. They are attracted to multiple genders, sometimes simultaneously. As such, they challenge the notion that love must be limited by social conventions like marriage or monogamy. Instead, bisexuals embrace fluidity and openness, celebrating the multiplicity of desires. They resist norms that dictate who they should love or sleep with. By doing so, they push back against the logic of exclusion that defines monogamy.

Bisexuality also raises questions about polyamory and non-monogamy. Polyamorous relationships allow for multiple partners without jealousy or possessiveness. But what happens when a bisexual person enters the mix? Do they have to choose between their primary partner(s) and secondary ones? Can they love all three (or more)? These questions raise complex issues regarding consent, communication, and negotiation.

Bisexuals challenge our assumptions about romantic love, too. What if someone loves two people at once? Or has feelings for different genders at different times? How does that affect commitment, trust, and loyalty within relationships? Bisexuality complicates these concepts, forcing us to rethink what constitutes true devotion and intimacy. It suggests that love is not tied to any particular gender or identity but arises from deep connections between individuals.

Bisexuality disrupts the logic of exclusion that structures sexual and relational ethics. By challenging binary categorizations, it forces us to question rigid boundaries around sex, love, and intimacy. It encourages us to explore new possibilities for desire and expression, pushing us beyond traditional frameworks for understanding human connection.

How does bisexuality disrupt the logic of exclusion that structures sexual and relational ethics?

Bisexuality challenges the notion of binaries and exclusive relationships as it recognizes the possibility of attractions towards people of different genders, identities, and sexes. The logic of exclusion in sexual and relational ethics is based on the idea that individuals can only be attracted to one gender or identity at a time, which implies that bisexuals cannot be faithful to their partners because they are attracted to other people who do not fit into this binary system.

#bisexuality#sexualethics#monogamy#relationships#attraction#identity#ambiguity