The idea of time is central to how people understand their lives, make choices, and navigate through different phases and stages. It is also important in terms of cultural and social norms that have been developed around various aspects of life such as career, family, education, and ageing.
It seems like these conventions may not be valid for everyone due to the existence of Queer Temporality. This refers to a way of living that challenges the traditional narrative surrounding certain life events and experiences, particularly those relating to gender, identity, sexuality, and romantic relationships. In this essay, I will examine how Queer Temporality can challenge socially imposed expectations and offer an alternative perspective on life milestones and transitions.
One aspect where Queer Temporality has challenged conventional timelines is in relation to marriage and parenthood. Traditionally, marriage was considered a necessary step in a person's life, leading to starting a family and creating one's own future. For LGBTQ+ individuals, however, this might not always be the case. Some may choose to never marry or have children, while others may want to do so but find themselves unable to legally because of lack of recognition or discrimination. The fact that they are queer means that they face additional obstacles when it comes to establishing relationships with partners or having biological children.
Same-sex couples may need to seek out fertility treatments or surrogacy services, which come at a high cost and may take several years to bear fruit.
Many countries still don't recognize same-sex marriages, making it difficult for queer people to enjoy the same benefits and privileges granted to heterosexual couples. Therefore, instead of following the usual trajectory towards marriage and childbearing, queer individuals must navigate their paths differently.
Another way that Queer Temporality challenges conventional narratives is by questioning ageism. Society often assumes that certain things should happen at specific stages of life, such as getting married or retiring from work.
This may not apply to everyone equally due to factors like sexuality or gender identity.
Some transgender individuals delay transitioning until later in life because they feel safer doing so after building up a stable career and financial security. This allows them to make an informed decision about whether to go through with it without risking losing their job or social status. Similarly, older people who identify as gay or lesbian may decide to start dating later than expected since they had to hide their sexuality during earlier phases of life and now feel free to be open about it. In both cases, Queer Temporality encourages individuals to break away from socially imposed expectations and prioritize what matters most to them.
There are also implications when it comes to romantic relationships. Societal norms dictate that partnerships should progress along a certain timeline, starting with courtship, engagement, and then culminating in marriage. Yet, Queer Temporality suggests that this isn't always possible or necessary. Some LGBTQ+ individuals may choose to remain single for long periods or opt out of monogamy entirely. Others might experiment with polyamory, which involves having multiple partners simultaneously. These alternative ways of living can challenge the notion of traditional love stories and relationship milestones, leading to new experiences and perspectives on intimacy.
Queer Temporality challenges conventional narratives by subverting timelines and expectations around various aspects of life such as marriage, parenthood, ageism, and romance. It encourages individuals to define their own path instead of following a predetermined trajectory set by society. By embracing different approaches to time and relationships, queer individuals help create diverse representations of life that expand our understanding of what is possible and desirable. Therefore, we must embrace these ideas and recognize the value they bring to our lives and communities.
How might queer temporality challenge conventional narratives of life, milestones, and socially imposed expectations?
Queer time is characterized by being nonlinear, unpredictable, and fluid, which challenges preconceived notions about chronology and progress towards specific goals or markers of success that are often associated with heteronormative society's expectations. This can disrupt the perceived orderliness and predictability of social norms and structures, as well as create tension between individual desires and cultural pressures.