Sexual competition is a universal phenomenon that exists among all human beings, regardless of gender, age, culture, religion, or social status. It refers to the desire to outperform others in attractiveness, sexual prowess, and reproductive success. This competition can have various effects on an individual's psychological well-being, including their sense of self-esteem, perception of relational value, and emotional security.
Let's look at how sexual competition affects self-esteem. Individuals who feel they are less attractive than others may experience lower levels of self-esteem, leading to feelings of shame, embarrassment, and inadequacy. In contrast, those who believe themselves more desirable tend to have higher self-confidence, which can boost their overall mood and behavior. The level of competition also plays a role in this relationship; individuals in highly competitive environments, such as nightclubs or online dating apps, may feel more pressure to perform sexually, resulting in greater anxiety and reduced self-worth if they fail.
Sexual competition impacts perceived relational value. When people compare themselves to others, they may become obsessed with seeking partners who meet specific physical or social criteria, such as wealth, height, or intelligence. They may also engage in risky behaviors, such as cheating or manipulation, to secure these relationships.
These efforts often backfire, leading to feelings of guilt, regret, and distrust. On the other hand, individuals who prioritize connection over appearance may find long-term happiness and stability in committed monogamous relationships.
Sexual competition influences emotional security. Those who depend on external validation through sexual performance may struggle to trust others emotionally, leading to jealousy, possessiveness, and emotional abuse. Alternatively, those who focus on intimacy and mutual respect may develop deeper connections that weather even the most challenging times. Competition can also lead to fear of abandonment, as individuals worry that they will be replaced by someone "better."
Sexual competition is an integral part of human nature, but it should not define our identities or relationships. By understanding its effects on psychological well-being, we can make healthier choices that promote personal growth and fulfillment.
How does sexual competition influence self-esteem, perceived relational value, and emotional security?
While there is still debate over how significant of an impact competition for mates has on individuals' self-esteem and emotional well-being, it appears that those who engage more competitively tend to have higher levels of confidence and self-worth compared to those who do not compete as much (Schoenfeld & Snyder, 2019).