When most people think about the challenges that military service poses to relationships, they tend to focus on the physical separation and emotional stressors that come from being away for extended periods of time.
There is another aspect of military life that can have a significant impact on romantic commitments – the psychological hazards that come from exposure to traumatic events. Trauma has been found to affect how individuals conceptualize future-oriented thinking, making it difficult for them to envision long-term relationships and plans. This effect can be especially acute among soldiers who are exposed daily to situations where future-oriented thinking becomes psychologically hazardous or impossible. In this article, we will explore how soldiers conceptualize romantic commitment when faced with these unique circumstances.
Military personnel often find themselves in dangerous situations where their lives are on the line, which can lead to high levels of stress and anxiety. The constant threat of death can make it difficult for soldiers to maintain healthy relationships and feel secure enough to commit emotionally. This can be especially true for those who have experienced multiple deployments or who have witnessed the death of friends or comrades. For some soldiers, this stress may cause them to withdraw from social interactions altogether, while others may turn to substance abuse or risky behaviors as coping mechanisms. These behaviors can put strain on relationships and make it hard to build trust and intimacy.
In addition to facing physical danger, soldiers also experience a great deal of emotional trauma. Witnessing violence and suffering can take a toll on mental health, leading to symptoms such as depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and anxiety. These symptoms can make it difficult for soldiers to connect with loved ones and form strong bonds. They may become isolated or distant, leading to feelings of loneliness and despair. For couples who are apart due to deployment, this isolation can further exacerbate the distance between them and make it harder to maintain a connection.
The combination of these factors can create a sense of instability and uncertainty that makes it difficult for soldiers to envision a future together. It becomes challenging to imagine what life will look like after service when they don't know if they will even survive the next day. As a result, many soldiers find themselves unable to commit fully to their partners or feel comfortable planning for the future. This lack of stability and security can lead to breakups and divorces among military personnel.
There are ways that soldiers can work around these obstacles. One approach is to focus on the present moment and enjoy time spent with loved ones while they have it. This can help soldiers feel more connected to those they care about and reduce feelings of isolation. Another approach is to seek support from mental health professionals who can help manage symptoms of PTSD and other psychological issues.
Couples can try to be flexible and adaptable, understanding that their relationship will likely change over time and that commitment doesn't always look the same in different stages of life.
Romantic commitments face unique challenges in the context of military service. Soldiers who experience trauma and stress may struggle to conceptualize long-term relationships, making it hard to plan for the future.
By focusing on the present moment and seeking support when needed, couples can navigate these difficulties and build stronger bonds despite the challenges.
How do soldiers conceptualize romantic commitment when exposed daily to situations where future-oriented thinking becomes psychologically hazardous or impossible?
In their book "The Psychology of Military Combat," Drs. Lindsay and O'Brien provide an explanation for how soldiers conceptualize romantic relationships during times of war. They argue that soldiers may find it difficult to think about long-term commitments due to the constant threat of danger and uncertainty surrounding them. This can lead to feelings of disconnection from loved ones at home who are not sharing the same experience, as well as a sense of detachment from the present moment.