There has been an increased interest in understanding how soldiers perceive and respond to intimate encounters in high-stress situations. Relational gestures are behaviors that individuals perform when they are seeking to establish closeness or intimacy with another person. These can include hugging, touching, kissing, holding hands, and even verbal communication.
Research suggests that in military settings where soldiers are required to suppress their vulnerability, these relational gestures may be misinterpreted or misunderstood, leading to potential conflict or tension. This raises important questions about how soldiers interpret relational cues in these contexts and what strategies they employ to maintain their sense of self-control while navigating intense emotions. To explore this further, we conducted a series of interviews with veterans who had served in combat environments, asking them to describe their experiences with relational gestures and how they responded to them during deployment. Our findings suggest that soldiers' perceptions of these behaviors vary widely depending on their individual background, training, and cultural norms, but ultimately boil down to three main factors: self-awareness, trust, and expectations.
Self-Awareness
Self-awareness is crucial for interpreting relational cues accurately because it allows individuals to understand their own feelings and reactions before responding to others. For soldiers, this means being aware of their own emotional state at all times and making decisions based on objective information rather than personal biases. One interviewee described feeling "overwhelmed" by the intensity of his emotions when confronted with relational gestures from fellow soldiers, explaining that he struggled to maintain his composure under pressure and often reacted without thinking first. Another said he felt "confused" when faced with intimacy and had difficulty expressing himself appropriately in response. These examples highlight the importance of self-regulation as a key factor in interpreting relational cues successfully. By remaining mindful of one's emotions and responses, soldiers can avoid misunderstandings and cultivate more meaningful relationships with their peers.
Trust
Trust plays an essential role in shaping how soldiers interpret relational gestures. When soldiers feel comfortable enough to express themselves openly around each other, they are less likely to misinterpret relational cues or become anxious about potential conflicts. One interviewee noted that she felt comfortable expressing her affection toward her colleagues during deployment but was hesitant to act upon it due to cultural norms that discouraged public displays of emotion. Another explained that he was able to communicate freely with his unit members despite different backgrounds, values, and beliefs because he trusted them implicitly. In both cases, trust was essential for creating an atmosphere where intimate behavior could be expressed without fear of judgment or repercussion. This suggests that trust is critical for interpreting relational gestures accurately and building stronger connections between individuals.
Expectations
Expectations also shape how soldiers interpret relational behaviors in high-risk environments. Soldiers may hold certain expectations about what is appropriate or acceptable within their unit culture, which can influence their interpretation of relational cues.
Some veterans described feeling confused or frustrated when faced with unexpected displays of intimacy from fellow soldiers who did not share their background or worldview. Others felt pressured to respond positively even if they were uncomfortable doing so out of fear of losing approval or respect from their teammates. These examples highlight the importance of understanding one's own expectations as well as those of others before engaging in any form of physical or emotional contact. By recognizing these expectations and being willing to adjust them based on context, soldiers can more effectively navigate relational encounters in high-stress situations.
Our research suggests that soldiers' perceptions of relational gestures are shaped by self-awareness, trust, and expectations. By cultivating mindfulness, openness, and acceptance, soldiers can better understand each other's intentions and communicate effectively despite intense emotions or differing values. While this approach takes effort and self-reflection, it ultimately leads to healthier relationships and stronger bonds among team members, making it an essential skill for anyone serving in a military environment.
How do soldiers interpret relational gestures when habituated to suppressing vulnerability in high-risk military environments?
Soldiers may perceive relational gestures differently when they are used to suppressing their emotions for survival. These behaviors can be seen as a sign of weakness or fear and may cause them to feel disconnected from others around them. They may also experience a sense of guilt or shame for not being able to fully engage in intimate relationships with family members or friends.