Sexual attraction is often seen as an involuntary process, where people are drawn to others based on physical appearance, shared interests, or similar backgrounds.
This is not always the case. Individuals also create narratives to justify their romantic choices, such as claiming they "just knew" it was right, or saying they have a history together. This article will explore how these stories shape perceptions of partners and influence future interactions.
Attraction-based decisions
Attraction-based decisions involve choosing someone based on what feels good in the moment, rather than considering long-term compatibility or mutual values. These choices may be influenced by factors like age, gender, race, socioeconomic status, or personality type.
A man may choose to date a woman because he finds her physically attractive, but later realize that they share little in common and struggle to connect emotionally.
Narrative construction
To make sense of attraction-based decisions, individuals often construct narratives about why they feel this way. They may say they had an instant connection, felt chemistry from the start, or were simply drawn to each other's energy. By doing so, they create a story that justifies their decision and makes it seem more logical.
Impact on perceptions
These narratives can impact how individuals perceive their partners. If they believe their relationship is based on destiny or fate, they may be less likely to question its validity. Similarly, if they view themselves as compatible with their partner due to shared interests, they may overlook fundamental differences that could lead to conflict down the line.
Future interactions
These narratives become part of the couple's shared reality and affect how they interact with each other. If one partner believes they have a special bond, they may not work as hard at maintaining the relationship since it seems "meant to be."
If they focus on superficial similarities, they may miss out on opportunities for deeper connections and growth.
Individuals often use narratives to justify attraction-based decisions, creating stories that fit within their personal belief systems. While this can help them make sense of their choices, it can also shape their views of their partners and influence future interactions. Understanding this process can help couples identify areas where they need to focus on compatibility rather than just attraction and avoid unhealthy patterns in relationships.
How do individuals construct narratives that justify attraction-based decisions?
Narrative construction is a cognitive process by which individuals create meaningful stories out of various experiences and events from their life. This process involves selecting certain information from one's personal history, reorganizing it, and interpreting it in a way that makes sense to them. When it comes to romantic relationships, individuals often engage in this process to explain why they are attracted to someone or what led them to pursue a relationship with a specific person.