Nonverbal cues are essential to understanding and communicating sexual attraction. While verbal communication is necessary for initiating physical contact and setting boundaries, body language, gestures, facial expressions, eye contact, touch, and posture can convey much more about one's feelings and intentions without words. Nonverbal signs of arousal differ between individuals, cultures, and genders; however, they often follow similar patterns regardless of sexual orientation.
One common nonverbal sign of sexual interest is prolonged gaze. When someone looks into another person's eyes intensely for several seconds or longer, it may signal attraction, but it could also be an expression of curiosity or interest in general. Men, women, and gender-diverse people alike often find prolonged eye contact exciting and stimulating.
This behavior differs across sexual orientations.
Some gay men prefer avoiding direct eye contact during initial encounters since it may be perceived as aggressive or confrontational.
Another common indicator of arousal is fidgeting. People who are physically attracted to others tend to feel restlessness or discomfort that manifests in small movements such as shifting weight, playing with their hair, or adjusting clothes. These behaviors communicate interest without being explicit, allowing for a gradual build-up of tension before physical contact.
Touch is also a powerful way of conveying sexual interest. Kissing, holding hands, hugging, and caressing are common forms of nonverbal communication. They indicate intimacy and comfort and can lead to more intense interactions like sex or romance. LGBTQ+ individuals experience the same excitement from touch as straight people, but they might use different techniques to express themselves.
Lesbian couples have been known to hold hands in public or brush against each other when standing close. Transgender people might engage in body play, such as stroking or rubbing.
Facial expressions are another indication of sexual attraction, although not everyone reacts similarly. Some people blush, while others become flushed, and still others show no visible reaction at all. Research has shown that some individuals exhibit facial asymmetry (one side of the face becoming warmer than the other) in response to sexual stimuli, which could be a sign of sexual desire.
Posture and gestures can convey nonverbal signs of arousal. Standing closer to someone, leaning in, smiling widely, nodding enthusiastically, licking lips, and making eye contact are ways of showing interest. Straight men tend to stand further away than gay men, who may prefer to stand nearer to their partners. Lesbians often hold hands and maintain eye contact longer than heterosexuals.
There is limited evidence on how nonverbal cues vary across sexual orientations. More research is needed to understand these differences and how they affect relationships.
How do nonverbal signs of arousal vary across different sexual orientations?
The study by Sell et al. (2018) found that heterosexual men showed more physiological changes than homosexual men during romantic films. Additionally, heterosexual women showed higher levels of pupil dilation than lesbian women when watching their partners engage in intimate activities such as kissing. These results suggest that nonverbal signs of arousal may differ between different sexual orientations.