Bisexuality is defined as having romantic attraction to both men and women. It has been seen as a unique form of non-monosexual orientation, which does not fit neatly into categories such as gay or straight. While the term has traditionally focused on hetero/homosexual distinction, it challenges conventional binary thinking in many ways.
Bisexuals may experience sexual attraction that is gender neutral or fluid rather than strictly male-female. They also often defy societal expectations regarding romance and marriage. In addition, bisexual individuals are less likely to identify as exclusively heterosexual or homosexual than their peers. This suggests that bisexuality can challenge psychology to value contradiction as an inherent feature of human identity.
I will discuss how bisexuality challenges psychological concepts about sexuality and relationships, and why understanding it as contradictory can be beneficial for mental health professionals and society at large. First, I will explore what makes bisexuality distinct from other orientations. Second, I will describe some common experiences of bisexual people and how they relate to the concept of contradiction.
I will suggest strategies for embracing bisexuality within counseling and therapy.
What Makes Bisexuality Distinct?
The first thing that sets bisexuality apart is its flexibility in terms of sexual attraction. Many bisexual people do not identify with either male or female genders, but instead see themselves as attracted to all kinds of people regardless of their sex. Some use gender-neutral pronouns like "they" and "them," while others simply don't think about gender when expressing attraction. This challenge to strict categories can lead to questions about whether someone who feels asexually attracted to both men and women should still identify as bi. While there is no one answer, many believe that feeling a sense of belonging to two or more groups qualifies as bisexual.
Bisexuals may also have difficulty fitting into societal norms regarding romance and marriage. Even though bisexual individuals are less likely than heterosexuals to marry, they are more likely than gay or lesbian people.
They often face pressure to choose between same-sex or opposite-sex partnerships. They may feel pressured by family members, friends, or even psychologists to pick a side and conform to traditional expectations of sexuality. But doing so could be detrimental to their mental health since it requires ignoring core aspects of their identity.
Experiences Related to Contradiction
Another way bisexuality challenges psychology is through the contradiction between sexual attraction and behavior. While some people may act on attractions for both men and women equally, others find it difficult due to social stigma or personal preference.
Someone might feel deeply drawn to their best friend of the same sex but never pursue them because of fear or discomfort with being labeled homosexual. Such contradictions can create tension in relationships and make it harder to fulfill basic needs for intimacy.
Bisexuality is distinct in its rejection of binary thinking altogether. It suggests that gender does not define an individual's worth or desirability. Many bisexual people experience this as a positive aspect of their orientation, especially when dealing with prejudice from either straight or LGBTQ+ communities. Instead of seeing themselves solely as either male or female, they see themselves as complex human beings who don't fit into neat boxes. This challenge to rigid categorization can lead to greater self-acceptance and pride.
Embracing Bisexuality in Therapy
Bisexuals face unique challenges within counseling and therapy. They may struggle with questions about whether they are really "bi" if they have only dated one partner of each gender. Or they may question why they feel attracted to multiple genders, which may seem counterintuitive to traditional models of sexual desire.
Embracing such complexity can improve outcomes by helping clients feel validated and understood. Psychologists should avoid judging bisexuality based on preconceived notions of what constitutes normal attraction or behavior. Instead, they should focus on supporting clients' authentic identity and recognizing how societal expectations affect their wellbeing.
Therapists might also help bi individuals explore the benefits of contradiction in terms of personal growth.
Feeling comfortable with being both masculine and feminine could help them navigate workplace dynamics more effectively. Understanding attraction without labels can also promote self-acceptance and reduce shame around non-monosexual orientations. In addition, exploring different types of relationships (e.g., polyamory) can enhance intimacy and encourage experimentation without fear of judgment.
Understanding bisexuality requires an openness to contradiction that goes against conventional wisdom. By seeing it as a natural part of human diversity, mental health professionals can better support people who identify this way. This approach can challenge binary thinking and promote greater empathy for all clients, regardless of orientation.
How might bisexuality challenge psychology to value contradiction as an inherent feature of human identity?
Bisexuality challenges traditional psychological theories that view sexuality as a binary construct by demonstrating that humans are capable of experiencing attraction towards individuals from multiple genders. This challenge to the notion of fixed gender roles and binaries can lead to a reconsideration of existing social structures and power dynamics.