The study of sexual fantasies has been around for a while, but it is still considered a taboo subject to discuss publicly. Despite this, the researchers have done numerous studies on this matter and found that sexual fantasies are common among people. They can be defined as "mental images or scenarios that describe an imagined future event involving emotional or physical contact between oneself and another individual" (Cochran & Meston, 2014).
There is much debate regarding what purpose these fantasies serve and how individuals negotiate the tension between private fantasy and shared relational reality. In this article, I will explore the psychological functions of sexual fantasies and how individuals manage the tension between them and their real-life relationship.
One proposed function of sexual fantasies is that they help individuals cope with stress and anxiety (Tiefer & Lackey, 2015).
When someone feels overwhelmed with work or family responsibilities, they may turn to sexual fantasies as an escape from reality. Sexual fantasies provide a sense of control and power in a world where many factors are beyond one's control. It can also release built-up tension and reduce negative feelings such as anger and frustration. This function is particularly important for those who experience difficulty regulating their emotions and expressing themselves in relationships.
Another proposed function of sexual fantasies is that they allow individuals to explore different identities and desires without fear of judgment or rejection (Bivona et al., 2016). People who struggle with self-esteem issues or body image may use sexual fantasies to feel desired and accepted despite their insecurities.
Sexual fantasies can provide a way for people to experiment with new ideas and experiences without committing to them in real life. They can be used to explore sexual interests outside of societal norms, such as fetishes or BDSM, without worrying about being rejected by others.
Sexual fantasies can also serve a socializing function, helping individuals learn about what is considered normal and acceptable behavior within a particular culture (Knox, 2008).
Some cultures have strict rules regarding the expression of sexuality, and individuals may not feel comfortable talking openly about it.
Through sexual fantasy, they can explore their desires and interests without feeling judged or outcasted. This can help individuals develop more nuanced views on sexuality and understand how others may view it differently.
There is often a conflict between private fantasy and shared relational reality (Cochran & Meston, 2014). When individuals share their sexual fantasies with partners, there is always a risk of disappointment or misunderstanding. Some partners may see these fantasies as indicative of a lack of trust or commitment to the relationship. Others may find it threatening or offensive. Therefore, individuals must navigate this tension carefully, choosing when and how to discuss their fantasies with partners while maintaining respect for their boundaries.
Sexual fantasies serve several psychological functions, including stress relief, identity exploration, and cultural education. Individuals must negotiate this tension between private fantasy and shared relational reality by communicating effectively with partners and understanding their own needs and desires. The study of sexual fantasies has important implications for mental health, relationships, and society's attitudes towards sex and sexuality.
What psychological functions do sexual fantasies serve, and how do individuals negotiate the tension between private fantasy and shared relational reality?
Sexual fantasies can be understood as one of the most powerful tools humans have to regulate their anxiety levels. Fantasies are used by many people as an escape from reality, a way to cope with stressors and other negative emotions, and as a tool to explore different parts of themselves that they might not want to express openly (e. g. , Buss & Schmitt, 1993).