Sexual identities play an important role in influencing human behavior, including their willingness to initiate, negotiate, or refuse intimate acts. This influence is not always straightforward or easy to predict, but it can be observed through careful study and analysis.
Some individuals may feel more comfortable initiating intimacy when they are in a relationship with someone of the same gender identity, while others may prefer to wait until they have developed a strong connection with someone before making any moves. Similarly, some people may find it easier to negotiate for specific types of intimacy based on their gender identity, such as those who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. Others may be less likely to refuse intimacy due to societal pressures or personal beliefs about what constitutes normal sexual behavior. In this article, we will explore how sexual identities shape these behaviors and provide examples from psychological research that help illustrate the complexity of these influences.
There are three main ways in which sexual identity shapes one's ability and willingness to initiate, negotiate, or refuse intimacy:
1. Personal attitudes and beliefs about sex and relationships. People who identify as LGBTQ+ may have different views and experiences regarding sex and relationships than those who identify as heterosexual or cisgender (i.e., not transgender). These differences can affect how comfortable someone feels initiating intimacy and navigating conversations about sex.
Studies show that lesbian women are more likely to be in polyamorous relationships than heterosexual couples (Purdy & Dixson, 2014). This could mean that they are more open to negotiating different types of intimate acts, including non-monogamy. Bisexual men, on the other hand, tend to engage in riskier sexual behavior than either straight or gay men (Kinsey Institute, 2019), which suggests a greater comfort with taking chances and exploring new things.
2. Expectations for social norms around sex and relationships. Someone's cultural background or upbringing can play a role in their perceptions of acceptable sexual behavior. Those who grow up in conservative religious communities may be less likely to feel comfortable discussing or engaging in nontraditional forms of intimacy, even if their personal identities do not align with traditional gender roles. Similarly, people from countries where same-sex relationships are illegal or stigmatized may face additional challenges when it comes to expressing their desires. A study of college students found that those from countries with anti-LGBT laws were less likely to report engaging in romantic and sexual activities with members of the same sex (Bergner et al., 2018).
3. Experiences with discrimination and prejudice based on identity. People who identify as LGBTQ+ often face significant societal pressures and negative stereotypes regarding their sexuality. These experiences can affect how willing someone is to initiate intimacy or refuse unwanted advances, especially if they have been subjected to violence, harassment, or rejection due to their identity. One study showed that transgender individuals reported higher rates of sexual victimization than cisgender individuals (Hatzenbuehler & Phelan, 2010). They also reported lower levels of emotional support from friends and family (Savin-Williams et al., 2014), which could make them more vulnerable to experiencing rejection or isolation.
Sexual identities influence human behaviors related to intimacy in complex ways. Attitudes, beliefs, cultural norms, and experiences all play a role in shaping one's comfort level with discussing and negotiating intimate acts. By understanding these influences, we can better appreciate the diversity of human behavior and promote healthy, respectful interactions between partners.
How do sexual identities influence the willingness to initiate, negotiate, or refuse intimacy?
Sexual identity is a complex construct that encompasses an individual's sense of self as it relates to their sexuality and gender. Studies have shown that individuals with various sexual identities may experience different levels of comfort and confidence when initiating, negotiating, and refusing intimacy.