In contemporary times, there has been much discussion about the role of time in relation to the experience of marginalized communities such as those that identify as LGBTQ+. While traditional linear narratives often depict these communities as moving towards progressive acceptance, many scholars have pointed out that this view fails to account for the complex and varied ways in which queer people navigate their identities and relationships within the constraints of time. Instead, some argue that a more nuanced understanding of temporalities is needed, one that acknowledges the multiple ways in which individuals can resist oppressive structures while also negotiating their own unique experiences of time. This essay seeks to explore the significance of milestones, disruptions, and non-linear experiences for ethics and existence within queer temporalities, drawing from research conducted with members of various sexual minority groups.
Milestones are significant moments in an individual's life that mark major events or achievements. For many queer people, these may include coming out to friends and family, starting a relationship, transitioning, undergoing medical procedures, or achieving professional successes. These milestones provide opportunities to reflect on personal growth and development, but they also serve as markers of societal expectations and norms. Some queer individuals find themselves feeling pressure to conform to heteronormative ideas of what constitutes a "successful" life trajectory, leading to feelings of isolation and shame when they fail to meet these standards.
Others embrace the freedom offered by non-normative timelines, using them to challenge dominant narratives and push back against expectations. In doing so, they redefine what it means to be successful and meaningful, creating alternative models of living that prioritize joy, pleasure, and community over financial gain or status.
Disruptions refer to unexpected occurrences that interrupt the flow of time, such as sudden illness, loss, or trauma. These experiences can radically alter one's perception of time, making it feel unpredictable and unreliable. Many LGBTQ+ individuals have reported feeling particularly vulnerable during times of disruption, as their identities and relationships are often already marginalized and stigmatized within society. Yet, some have found that these moments offer important insights into the contingency of existence, reminding them of the fleeting nature of life and the preciousness of each moment. They use this awareness to cultivate mindfulness and gratitude, embracing the present while also recognizing its impermanence. Others may experience disruptions as catalysts for transformation, allowing them to reimagine their lives in ways that honor their authentic selves and desires.
Non-linear experiences involve breaking away from traditional chronological patterns, such as skipping around in time or experiencing multiple lifetimes simultaneously. Some queer people report having vivid dreams or visions of past lives, while others find themselves pulled towards mystical practices or spirituality. For many, non-linearity allows them to connect with a broader sense of self beyond the constraints of linear time, connecting with ancestors, spirit guides, or collective memories that transcend individual experiences. This connection can be especially powerful when combined with other forms of resistance, such as activism or community organizing, allowing queer individuals to draw on intergenerational knowledge and support.
Some caution against romanticizing non-linearity too much, noting that it can also reinforce binary thinking about gender, race, and power dynamics.
Understanding the complexities of temporalities helps us better appreciate the diverse experiences of LGBTQ+ communities and the ethical implications of those experiences. By embracing alternative models of living, we can challenge dominant narratives and create new possibilities for existence that prioritize joy, pleasure, and community over conformity. While linear timelines may seem stable and predictable, they are often based on assumptions about what constitutes success and happiness, which are not universal or inherently positive. Instead, we should strive to understand each person's unique experience within the context of their own history, relationships, and circumstances, recognizing the agency and resilience that underlie even the most challenging moments.
What insights emerge from queer temporalities regarding the ethical and existential significance of milestones, disruptions, and non-linear experiences?
Queer temporalities highlight the importance of recognizing that life is not linear, but rather cyclical. Milestones can be seen as markers along this cycle, while disruptions are moments where it is necessary to reevaluate one's course. Existentially, there may be less emphasis on reaching certain goals at specific times and more focus on living authentically in the present moment.