Soldiers are trained to be emotionally detached from their actions during combat, which can enhance their performance on the battlefield.
This detachment also makes it difficult for them to form meaningful connections with family members, friends, and loved ones outside of combat. This article explores how soldiers navigate this tension between enhancing combat performance and maintaining personal relationships.
Emotional detachment is an essential skill for soldiers, particularly when they face life-threatening situations on the battlefield. By detaching themselves emotionally from the horrors of war, soldiers can remain focused on completing their mission and protecting themselves and their comrades. This emotional distance allows soldiers to make quick decisions without being influenced by fear, panic, or other negative emotions. Without this ability, many soldiers would become paralyzed by fear or overwhelmed by trauma, making them less effective fighters.
This emotional detachment has consequences beyond the battlefield. Soldiers who have been conditioned to suppress their emotions find it challenging to express themselves in healthy ways outside of combat. They may struggle to connect with others emotionally, leading to difficulties forming strong bonds with family members, friends, and partners. They may feel isolated and disconnected from society at large, struggling to find common ground with people who have not experienced the same level of stress and trauma.
To manage these conflicts, some soldiers develop coping mechanisms that allow them to both maintain emotional detachment while building meaningful relationships.
They may practice mindfulness techniques to stay present in their everyday lives but still maintain a degree of emotional distance. Others may seek out support groups or therapy to help process their experiences and build healthy communication skills. Some may even take time off from military service entirely to reintegrate into civilian life before attempting romantic relationships.
Soldiers must balance their need for emotional detachment during combat with their desire for intimate connections with loved ones. The key is finding a way to maintain a sense of emotional detachment when necessary but be able to switch gears quickly and be fully present when engaging in personal relationships. This requires self-awareness, discipline, and the ability to regulate one's emotions. By recognizing and addressing these internal conflicts, soldiers can lead more fulfilling lives both on and off the battlefield.
How do soldiers negotiate internal conflicts when emotional detachment enhances combat performance but undermines relational intimacy?
Many studies have shown that emotionally distant behavior is a common strategy for soldiers to protect themselves from fear, anxiety, grief, guilt, shame, anger, disgust, disappointment, jealousy, and embarrassment during war (Everly & Lating, 2017; Levy et al. , 2009). This strategy helps them remain calm under pressure and focus on tasks like firing their guns or following commands.