How can people remain satisfied in their romantic relationships even when faced with social stigma and prejudice based on gender identity, sexual orientation, race, religion, age, socioeconomic status, body type, physical appearance, mental illness, disability, etc.? This question has been explored extensively in psychology research. One possible answer is that individuals are able to maintain positive perceptions of their partners through active cognitive processing, which involves selective attention to positive aspects of the relationship and minimization of negative ones. Another possibility is that individuals develop personal beliefs about their worthiness and the value of their relationships, allowing them to override external messages that suggest they should feel less than others.
Self-acceptance may play a role in mitigating the impact of discrimination, as it promotes resilience and reduces feelings of shame and guilt associated with being different.
Active Cognitive Processing
When individuals face social adversity related to their identities, they tend to engage in active cognitive processing to maintain positive evaluations of themselves and their partners.
In a study of same-sex couples, participants reported more frequent use of cognitive reappraisal strategies (i.e., changing the meaning or context of a situation) compared to heterosexual couples. This suggests that these individuals were actively working to interpret their experiences in ways that enhanced their sense of belonging and acceptance within society. Similarly, in a study of interracial couples, participants who used cognitive reappraisal had higher relationship satisfaction than those who did not. These findings highlight how active cognitive processing can help people maintain positive views of themselves and their partners despite societal pressures.
Personal Beliefs About Relationship Value
Another way people may remain satisfied in their romantic relationships is by holding strong personal beliefs about the importance of their relationships. In one study, women who held strong gender identity beliefs (i.e., believing that men and women are inherently different) reported greater relationship satisfaction than those who did not. This suggests that having a clear view of the value of one's partner can override external messages suggesting otherwise. Similarly, in another study, individuals with high levels of self-esteem and commitment to their relationships felt less threatened by discrimination based on sexual orientation or race. Taken together, these studies suggest that personal beliefs about the worthiness of one's partner and relationship can help buffer against negative social messages.
Self-Acceptance
Self-acceptance may play an important role in promoting relational satisfaction for stigmatized groups. Individuals who feel comfortable and confident in their identities may be more likely to form satisfying relationships because they do not perceive themselves as inferior to others.
In a study of individuals with mental illness, those who had higher self-esteem reported greater relationship satisfaction than those with lower self-esteem.
In a study of individuals with physical disabilities, those with higher self-esteem also reported greater relationship satisfaction. These findings demonstrate the benefits of self-acceptance in promoting positive perceptions of oneself and one's relationships despite stigma.
Psychological processes such as active cognitive processing, personal beliefs about relationship value, and self-acceptance may all contribute to relational satisfaction despite ongoing discrimination. By actively interpreting experiences in ways that promote positivity and valuing their partnerships deeply, individuals can maintain strong relationships despite societal pressures. This suggests that targeted interventions aimed at supporting self-acceptance and relationship beliefs could potentially improve the lives of marginalized communities. Future research should investigate how these factors interact with other variables (e.g., resilience) and whether they are more or less effective for different types of identities and contexts.
What psychological processes underlie relational satisfaction despite ongoing discrimination?
Relationship satisfaction can be influenced by various factors such as communication, shared interests, trust, mutual respect, and support. Despite facing discrimination, individuals may still experience high levels of relationship satisfaction if these factors are present in their relationships. The psychological process underlying this phenomenon is often referred to as "attachment". According to attachment theory, people seek out secure attachments with others who provide them with comfort, protection, and validation.