A survey conducted among college students showed that 80% have had some type of sexual experience before entering into a committed relationship. This includes kissing, touching, intercourse, masturbation, oral sex, and more. Those who did so were asked how it affected their trust in future partners.
Respondents gave mixed answers. Some said they felt better about themselves after being sexually intimate because it made them feel desired and attractive to others. They believed this helped build confidence for new relationships. Others felt guilty, ashamed, or like they couldn't commit fully due to past experiences. Many feared rejection, fearing partners would think less of them if they weren't as experienced as others. Still, others felt empowered and secure when entering new relationships having already explored physical boundaries.
This shows sexual behaviors can impact relational trust and security differently depending on each person's unique background, values, and beliefs.
Someone from a conservative family may be more likely to view sex as taboo and shameful than someone who grew up in an open environment. One student said, "Sexual experimentation made me realize what I like and don't like, but also made me feel like I didn't deserve love because I wasn't pure." Another noted, "I was hesitant at first with my partner since he had a lot of experience, but we talked through our differences, and now we share a deep bond."
Some studies suggest that early sexual behavior is linked to higher rates of divorce later in life. When people enter marriage with high sexual frequency, they may lack the communication skills necessary for sustained intimacy. Sex is only one part of a relationship, yet many depend too heavily on it rather than emotional connection.
Some couples may become bored with routine sex, leading to infidelity and cheating. This can damage trust even further.
It's important to remember every couple is different, so there are no set rules about how much sex is 'normal.'
It is essential to consider how your own sexual history affects future relationships and communicate openly with partners about what you want and need from them. Be honest, respectful, and willing to compromise if both parties benefit from doing so. By understanding ourselves and each other better, we can create stronger bonds based on mutual respect and affection.
To what degree do sexual behaviors impact relational trust and security?
Sexual behavior can have significant effects on relational trust and security. Studies show that individuals who engage in casual sex may experience decreased feelings of trust and intimacy within their relationships compared to those who abstain from such activities (Manning & Burroughs, 2018).