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SEXUAL ENGAGEMENT: HOW TO USE IT EFFECTIVELY DESPITE ITS RISKS

Sexual Engagement

Sexual engagement is an activity that involves physical or mental stimulation between two or more people, leading to pleasure, excitement, and sometimes orgasm. It can take place through various forms such as intercourse, kissing, touching, foreplay, and masturbation. Sexual engagement has several benefits for individuals' health, including reduced stress levels, improved immune system function, and increased endorphin production.

It also creates a form of escape from reality where individuals may avoid facing deeper relational dissatisfaction or emotional conflict. In this essay, I will discuss how individuals might use sexual engagement to avoid these issues.

Emotional Conflict

Emotional conflicts occur when there are disagreements between partners about feelings, opinions, or decisions.

One partner may feel hurt because the other did not fulfill their expectations, while the latter may not understand why they were expected to do so. These situations create tension, causing individuals to withdraw emotionally or act out aggressively.

To address these conflicts, individuals need effective communication skills, compromise, understanding, and patience. They should open up and share their thoughts and emotions without blaming each other. Unfortunately, many couples lack these abilities, leading them to engage in sexual activities rather than talk about their concerns. During sex, they can ignore any negative thoughts or emotions, focusing only on pleasure and release. This strategy provides short-term relief but does not solve underlying problems. Instead, it hides them underneath layers of physical satisfaction, making them worse over time.

Relational Dissatisfaction

Relational dissatisfaction refers to unhappiness with one's relationship status due to various factors such as infidelity, neglect, unresolved issues, lack of intimacy, or lack of commitment. Individuals may feel alone, disconnected, or even angry with their partners, leading to resentment and frustration. To overcome these challenges, they must work together towards resolving differences, improving communication, and deepening intimacy.

Some individuals prefer escaping into sex instead of facing their problems head-on. They use this distraction to avoid dealing with the root cause of their dissatisfaction.

Sexual engagement creates an illusion of closeness where individuals temporarily forget about relational woes. It makes them feel connected physically and mentally, providing a brief sense of happiness.

It does not address underlying tensions that lead to dissatisfaction. Once the excitement fades away, they return to their usual state, feeling guilty for avoiding the problem. In some cases, they might repeat the cycle again, creating a vicious cycle that undermines their relationship.

Sexual engagement has become a prevalent form of escape from reality in our modern society. While it can provide momentary pleasure, it cannot address deeper relational issues. Individuals who rely on it are likely to face emotional conflicts and relational dissatisfaction eventually. Instead of using sex to run away from their concerns, they should learn effective communication skills, compromise, and empathy. This way, they can build healthier relationships based on trust, respect, and mutual understanding.

How might individuals use sexual engagement to avoid addressing deeper relational dissatisfaction or emotional conflict?

Some individuals may engage in sexual activity as a way to avoid confronting underlying issues within their relationship or to escape from their emotions. Sexual engagement can provide a temporary sense of intimacy and connection that distracts from feelings of loneliness or discomfort. It can also be used as an outlet for negative emotions such as anger or frustration, providing a release that does not require communication or introspection.

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