Sexual closeness is an important aspect of human existence that has been explored for centuries through literature, art, philosophy, psychology, sociology, medicine, biology, anthropology, and many other fields of study. From ancient times to modern day, humans have sought out sexual experiences as a means of expressing love, pleasure, intimacy, validation, fulfillment, belonging, excitement, safety, power, vulnerability, and more.
Some researchers have suggested that there may be deeper motivations behind these pursuits, particularly when it comes to existential fears such as mortality and meaninglessness. In this article, I will explore how existential fears can influence our desire for sexual closeness and how they play into the idea that sexual intimacy can provide reassurance against those fears.
Existential Fears
Let's define what existential fears are. Existential fears refer to the anxieties or dread that people experience around the fundamental questions of life, such as "Why am I here?" or "What is my purpose in life?". These questions can arise from many different sources, including cultural expectations, personal belief systems, past traumas, mental health issues, and simply living in an uncertain world. The most common existential fears include death, meaninglessness, isolation, freedom, guilt, and transcendence. When faced with these fears, individuals often seek comfort, security, or meaning in various ways, including spirituality, relationships, creativity, work, hobbies, travel, substances, and sex.
Sexual Intimacy and Mortality
When it comes to mortality, many people find themselves seeking out sexual closeness as a way to cope with their own mortality and the eventual death of loved ones. This may manifest in various ways, such as a heightened awareness of one's physical body and desires while alive or a desire to leave behind a legacy through procreation. Some people also turn towards sexual intimacy as a form of escapism or distraction from thoughts about their own mortality, using it as a way to avoid facing their fears. Others may seek out sexual experiences for validation or approval, using them as a means to prove their worthiness or value in a partner's eyes. Whatever the motivation, the idea that sexual intimacy provides reassurance against death can be powerful and enduring.
Meaninglessness and Sexual Closeness
Existential fears around meaninglessness can lead some people to pursue sexual closeness as a way to feel connected to something greater than themselves. In this context, sex becomes a way to connect with another person on an emotional and physical level, creating a sense of belonging and purpose within a larger universe. This can take different forms, such as romantic love, spiritual union, or simply feeling "in the flow" during an intense encounter. For others, sexual intimacy may become a way to temporarily forget the meaninglessness of life, allowing them to escape into a world where pleasure is all that matters.
Existential fears are complex and multifaceted phenomena that affect every aspect of human existence, including our relationships and sexuality. By understanding how these fears shape our behavior and desires, we can gain insight into why certain individuals seek out sexual intimacy in particular ways. While not everyone will find comfort in the same things, exploring the role of existential fears in sexual closeness can help us better understand ourselves and each other.
In what ways do existential fears, such as mortality or meaninglessness, inform the pursuit of sexual closeness as a form of reassurance?
The concept of existential fear is closely related to one's perception of their existence and purpose in life. Fear of death can trigger anxiety and a need for a sense of security, which may be fulfilled through close relationships and intimacy with others. Sexual closeness can serve as a way to alleviate this existential fear by providing a temporary escape from thoughts of mortality.