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SEXUAL ATTRACTION AND PERCEIVING RELATIONAL RISKS IN INTIMACY: HORMONES CAN BLIND US TO THE DANGERS OF DESIRE

Sexual desire is a natural human instinct that can be both physically and psychologically satisfying.

It can also cause people to ignore warning signs and ignore red flags regarding relational risks, boundaries, and power imbalances. When an individual feels attracted to someone else, they may become blind to potential problems in their relationship. They may feel like nothing bad could ever happen because they are so enamored with the person they find sexy. This can lead them to take unnecessary chances or engage in behaviors that put themselves or others in danger. In this article, I will explore how sexual attraction distorts individuals' ability to perceive relational risks, boundaries, or power imbalances.

When an individual becomes aroused, their brain releases chemicals such as dopamine and oxytocin which can cloud judgment and make decision-making difficult. These hormones can make them more likely to ignore potential dangers or concerns when making decisions about the person they find sexually appealing. They may also make it harder for them to recognize if the other person is interested in more than just sex or is using them for personal gain.

Individuals who are already feeling vulnerable or insecure may feel even more compelled to seek out intimate relationships, regardless of whether they are safe or not.

A woman may overlook her partner's abusive behavior because she is afraid of being alone again after a previous failed marriage.

Sexual attraction can create a sense of power imbalance between two people. The person who has control over their desires is often seen as having greater power in the relationship. This can lead to manipulation or coercion on one side while the other is more likely to succumb to pressure due to feelings of obligation. It also means that one person may be able to exert more influence over another without consequences. This can lead to dangerous situations like assault or abuse. People may also feel pressured into doing things they would normally not do because they want to please their partner or fear losing them.

Sexual attraction can cause people to cross boundaries that should not be crossed. When someone feels attracted to another person, they may become less aware of societal norms and rules around appropriate behavior. This can result in behaviors such as harassment or unwanted advances that violate another person's autonomy and privacy. Sexual desire can also make someone ignore signs that the other person does not want to engage in sexual activity, leading to non-consensual encounters.

Sexual attraction distorts an individual's ability to perceive relational risks, boundaries, and power imbalances by clouding judgment, creating a sense of vulnerability, and making it harder for individuals to recognize when lines have been crossed.

How might sexual attraction distort individuals' ability to perceive relational risks, boundaries, or power imbalances?

One study shows that heterosexual men tend to be more attracted to women who are physically similar to them than those with dissimilar physical characteristics (Bateman et al. , 2018). This may create a sense of familiarity and comfort, leading to overestimating the level of intimacy or closeness between two people.

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