Religious beliefs and customs have shaped many aspects of Vietnamese society, including family life, marriage, and gender roles. Traditional Vietnamese society has historically placed a strong emphasis on preserving cultural and societal norms regarding sexuality, and these values continue to influence contemporary attitudes and behaviors towards romantic relationships and sexuality. Religious traditions such as Buddhism and Confucianism play an important role in Vietnam's cohabitation practices, sexual negotiation, and relational trust among couples. In this article, I will examine how religious perspectives shape these elements of modern romantic relationships.
Cohabitation Practices
Traditionally, most Vietnamese families lived together under one roof, which was called "matriarchal" because it was ruled by the mother-in-law. The patriarch, usually the father-in-law or grandfather, had absolute authority in his household. This system created conflict between husband and wife, and sometimes they decided to leave their parents and establish a separate home with their children.
Some families still maintained the matriarchal system even after moving out. These systems were not always ideal for young people looking for privacy and freedom. Therefore, cohabitation practices are becoming more common in Vietnam today. Religious views have also contributed to the trend towards cohabitation.
Buddhist scriptures say that men should avoid excessive sexual activity and be monogamous with their wives, so many young people choose to live together before marriage as a way to test each other's commitment and compatibility. Some Buddhists believe that living together before marriage is wrong because it may lead to immoral behavior or unfaithfulness. Meanwhile, Christianity emphasizes chastity and fidelity, which leads some Christians to wait until marriage to engage in sexual intimacy.
Sexual Negotiation
Vietnamese society has traditionally placed restrictions on premarital sex, especially for women.
Increasing globalization and exposure to Western culture have made premarital sex more acceptable among younger generations. Many couples are exploring new ways of negotiating sexual boundaries within their relationships, such as setting rules about when and how often they can have sex. Some couples use religious principles to guide their decisions, such as abstaining from sex during certain times of the month or only having sex in certain positions. Others may practice celibacy altogether, believing that saving themselves for marriage makes them more pure and loyal partners.
Relational Trust
Religion plays an important role in building trust between romantic partners. In Vietnamese culture, marriages are seen as lifelong commitments, and couples typically stay together even if one partner is cheating or being unfaithful. Religious beliefs also dictate how much information couples share with each other about past relationships or flirtations.
Confucianism emphasizes filial piety, so many married men keep secrets about their past romantic relationships from their wives. Some religious groups, like Catholics, have strong views against divorce and require counseling before ending a marriage. These traditions can make it difficult for couples to be open and honest with each other about their feelings and desires.
In Vietnam, how do religious perspectives shape cohabitation practices, sexual negotiation, and relational trust among couples?
Religious beliefs can influence individuals' views on cohabitation, sexual negotiation, and relational trust in several ways. In Vietnamese culture, traditional values and beliefs dictate that marriage is a sacred bond between two people who have committed themselves to each other for life. This means that any form of physical intimacy outside of marriage is considered taboo and immoral.