The purpose of this article is to provide evidence-based advice for maintaining relational resilience and intimacy among lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer (LGBT) couples who have experienced repeated exposure to trauma or chronic stress from military service or combat deployment. The research literature suggests that LGBT couples face unique challenges related to the stigma and discrimination they experience within their communities and institutions, including the military. These experiences can lead to feelings of disconnection, isolation, and loss of trust between partners.
There are strategies that couples can employ to build and sustain strong bonds despite these challenges.
One strategy is to engage in regular communication about the traumatic events that impacted both individuals and how those events continue to affect them today. This may involve sharing stories, emotions, and fears openly and listening actively to each other's perspectives. Couples should also prioritize quality time together, setting aside dedicated space for talking, laughing, playing, and intimacy. This can be especially important when faced with physical separation due to deployments or relocations. Regular date nights or weekend getaways can help couples stay connected emotionally even when apart physically.
Another strategy is to focus on shared interests and activities outside of work or parenthood.
Taking up a new hobby together, attending cultural events, or exploring new places can create positive memories and strengthen the bond between partners. It can also provide opportunities for playfulness, laughter, and mutual support during difficult times.
Couples can practice self-care by scheduling regular exercise, relaxation, and rest, which can improve overall wellbeing and reduce stress levels.
It is essential to seek professional support if needed from a therapist or counselor who specializes in LGBT mental health issues.
Maintaining relational resilience and intimacy as an LGBT couple requires intentional effort and commitment. By engaging in regular communication, prioritizing quality time together, focusing on shared interests and activities, practicing self-care, and seeking support when necessary, couples can weather the challenges of trauma and combat stress and build strong, lasting bonds.
How do LGBT couples maintain relational resilience and intimacy under repeated exposure to combat stress?
Research has found that LGBT couples face unique challenges when it comes to developing and maintaining healthy relationships due to discrimination, stigma, and social isolation (Bass & DeCamp, 2015). These factors can create a sense of vulnerability and instability within the relationship, making it difficult for partners to feel secure in their commitment to each other.