Couples Reconciling Differences Post-Deployment
When soldiers are deployed for an extended period of time, they experience significant changes in their lives that affect them both physically and psychologically. One of the most significant changes is the disruption of their relationships back home. This can lead to differences in perceptions of relational commitment, desire, and sexual responsiveness between partners. In this article, I will explore how couples reconcile these differing perspectives post-deployment.
Before deployment, couples often have a clear understanding of what their relationship means to each other. They share a common vision of where they want their relationship to go and what it looks like.
When one partner is away for an extended period of time, this shared vision may become uncertain.
If the soldier has been gone for several months, the partner at home may feel like they are no longer part of a couple and start dating others. If the soldier returns from deployment with injuries or mental health issues, they may also need additional support and attention that can make the partner feel less loved.
To reconcile these differences, it's important for couples to communicate openly and honestly about their needs and desires. The soldier should explain why they were distant during deployment and express their love and affection for their partner. The partner at home should try to understand the soldier's situation and be patient while they readjust to civilian life. It's also helpful to set aside specific times for intimacy and sex so that both partners feel desired and appreciated.
In addition to communication, couples can also seek professional help. A therapist can provide guidance on navigating difficult conversations and helping each partner feel heard and understood. Therapy can also address any underlying issues that may be affecting the relationship, such as past trauma or insecurities.
Reconciling differences in perceptions of relational commitment, desire, and sexual responsiveness after deployment takes effort and patience. But by communicating clearly, seeking professional help, and setting boundaries, couples can create a strong and healthy relationship post-deployment.
In what ways do couples reconcile differing perceptions of relational commitment, desire, and sexual responsiveness post-deployment?
Most couples who have faced deployment stressors together often experience difficulties when reconnecting with each other afterward due to different perceptions of the relationship's status quo. While some partners may feel closer and more committed than before, others may perceive it as an attempt to compensate for the absence, leading to feelings of betrayal and distrust. This can manifest itself in various ways, including nonverbal cues like body language, touch, tone, and eye contact.