Soldiers face many challenges while away from their loved ones, including the possibility of postponing physical contact and emotional closeness until they return home after deployment. While this may be necessary for operational security reasons, it can lead to feelings of guilt, frustration, and insecurity related to their relationships. This essay explores how military personnel cope with these psychological effects, drawing on research studies and personal anecdotes.
One study found that soldiers who experienced long periods of separation reported higher levels of anxiety and depression compared to those who were able to maintain more regular contact with their partners. The authors suggest that this is because physical intimacy is an important component of relationship satisfaction, which makes it difficult for soldiers to feel emotionally connected when they are physically distant. In addition, some studies have shown that soldiers may experience "intimacy avoidance" during deployment, leading them to withdraw from social interactions or even seek out new sexual encounters to compensate for feelings of loneliness.
Personal accounts also highlight the challenges of interrupted intimacy for soldiers. One soldier interviewed for a documentary described feeling guilty about his lack of communication with his partner, saying "It's hard being away from someone you love and knowing that every day could be your last." Another soldier shared her struggles with trust issues, noting that she felt insecure in her relationship due to the frequent changes in circumstances and responsibilities.
There are strategies that soldiers can use to manage these psychological effects. Some recommendations include prioritizing daily check-ins with loved ones through phone calls or video chats, engaging in healthy coping mechanisms like exercise or meditation, and finding emotional support from other military personnel or veterans.
Reframing negative thoughts and focusing on positive aspects of one's relationships can help mitigate guilt and anxiety related to interrupted intimacy.
While interrupted intimacy or separation can lead to emotional distress, soldiers can take steps to cope with these feelings and build stronger relationships upon returning home. By understanding the psychological impacts of deployment and developing healthy coping mechanisms, soldiers can maintain their physical and mental wellbeing both at home and abroad.
How do soldiers cope with guilt, frustration, or insecurity caused by interrupted intimacy or separation?
Most soldiers have a tendency to suppress their feelings of guilt, frustration, and insecurity because they are trained not to show any signs of weakness or vulnerability. They may avoid talking about these issues altogether due to a fear of being seen as emotionally unstable or weak. Some may try to distract themselves from negative thoughts by engaging in physical activity, drinking alcohol, or participating in other forms of self-destructive behavior.